Tag: growth

dare to be different

Stripped

2chicksandapen

Have you ever thought about stripping your life down to the basics? Wiping away the comforts of this or that and replacing those with wonder and curiosity? I didn’t really think about this per se but I made a plan and took action and the reality is I was stripped. 

I wasn’t stripped naked as in bare skinned. I was less full of the extra fluff in life. Down to the bare minimum allowing myself to immerse in new surroundings. I spent some time in nature. I enjoyed deer up close and to show how close I snapped a pic of their doo doo. Yes I’m that weird. I listened to sounds. Sometimes just the quiet of the day or the night. The peaceful air when stripped lets you reflect a little differently. No TV blaring. No dogs barking. No kids demanding attention. I even met some nice new people but I also met some folks that were not as nice. The latter being a great view of people weighed down in life. 

Peeling back the onion on people. How an environment can cause somebody to be bitter or how life can just make a person salty for this reason or that reason. At the end of the day I choose my reaction to those that may be in their salty stage of life! I can choose to greet them with the mirrored version of themselves or I can sprinkle a little pixie dust on their day in hopes they may see light vs darkness in the rest of their day.

I had no idea how wild the feelings would be. A fresh slate to paint awaits. My four walls became an amazing canvas to paint my life sparkles on. No real boundaries. It like going off to college for the first time to experience life yet I have all the life experiences to apply to my new found canvas. Interesting and odd at the same time. Stripped is the new state I encourage for all those in the almost golden era. A new kind of naked. Some may fear the boldness associated with stripping but I embrace it in a full Monty kind of fashion.

A shift. A little distance. An awakening. A reset of the mind, the body and the soul. A feeling of thankfulness floats in the air. A rumble in the tummy indicates the hunger to see all that’s new and near. The jolt of energy that sparks the day knowing today is a new day full of what’s surprises lurking around the corner for me.

This rambling is about a life shift. A transition of living for my kids and what’s best for them to the collective space for me to start living those golden years before I am too old to embrace the wonder of today. I’m choosing to make those memories now to fill my memory bank for the days that I am forced to live viewing what’s in the rearview. That day may come, but until then I’m chasing what’s ahead vs dwelling on what’s behind.

Don’t let today pass you by. Try the new foods. Make the new friends. Join that club that stretches your comfort zone. Undo your comfort zone. Get naked in life! Be extraordinary. We have one life in front of us. We can make it an adventure or we can make it a carousel that just spins round and round.

Off to see what’s on today’s horizon.

celebrations, dare to be different

31 Days: The 2025 Edition

2chicksandapen

Oh the beautiful life we are given and the blank slate we have to write our story as we live each day. For this reason and many more I am continuing my tradition of my list of 31. The list that summarizes a glimpse of my month or 31 days each year. It’s fun to see what makes the list, but it’s just as fun to review the lists of years past.

It’s a great way for me to see that I am constantly evolving and also for others to take a peek and see if they are stuck in a way or maybe want to feel enlightened to try x, y or z. I’m always moving forward but I’m always looking back to remember how far I’ve come. 

1-I put a property under contract.

2-I closed on said property.

3-I planned a relocation.

4-i planned a trip.

5-I booked a massage.

6-I ate brunch with friends.

7-I made some new friends.

8-I read a new book.

9-I did some writing.

10-I did some strategic planning.

11-I made some donations.

12-I had many hard conversations.

13-I dealt with plenty of adversity personally and professionally.

14-I played tennis in the frigid cold.

15-I was a Good Samaritan in an ice storm.

16-I played in snow not once but twice.

17-I spent time with my mom being silly.

18-I spoiled my dogs.

19-I got a BIG ASS calendar for 2025.

20-I spent a lot of money.

21-I watched Trump take his presidency.

22-I went to North Carolina.

23-I was assigned Lori as my tennis alter ego.

24-I dealt with a leaky windshield for the first time ever in a car.

25-I sold two motorcycles.

26-I ate some good home cooked meals.

27-I initiated several new projects.

28-I learned how to connect a stove to a smart house.

29-I worked hard to bring home the bacon.

30-I played equally hard outside the workplace.

31- I started the countdown to retire.

This year I didn’t really elaborate on any of the 31 items. Not really sure why I kept it simple, but I just did. When I reflect on my state of mind this month I’m summing it up as happy. 

I’m a at peace with so many things in life. I’m finally settled into the role of empty nester. It has been a process to get fully untethered, but it was worth the wait I suppose.

The blue skies.

The less travelled road.

The quiet car rides to new destinations.

The allure of chasing the new in life.

The freeing feeling of letting go of things.

The warmth of a good cup of coffee and

the ambiance that it’s entangled with.

Just a few notes for me to recall down the road. Nothing fancy, but a blissful state of mind. Off I go into the sunset somewhere day dreaming of what’s near but also what’s far. Just a day in my life to share.

#TinkRuns2024

I’m Doing It! June 2024

2chicksandapen

Month 6.

Half way.

Happy the way to somewhere or nowhere? That what’s been on my mind this month.

An MRI for the knees. A milestone I didn’t anticipate before I started this running project. Happy I can get up each day and go but frustrated I can’t go at full speed on anything. Unfortunately, injuries can sideline you when you least expect it. This pretty much describes my current stats: ongoing recovery.

This month marks another 5k that I was expecting to be special. Instead I did a park 5k solo and I’m opting for no races in June to work on my overall recovery plan and enjoy my travel without extra aches and pains. A personal choice. This was an easier decision after the 5k I wanted to do had a date change that conflicted with my travel and the course was going to change. All of a sudden I wasn’t destined to do this race!

It was a year ago I ran the 5k. My mental game probably wasn’t as strong as it is today and my body wasn’t as prepared for the run a year ago. To see the comparison in time and how I feel after this race was really something I’ve been looking forward to. A full circle vision of hard work. Did it pay off? I wanted to know. I won’t know exactly because I’m not repeating the race. I do know however my 5k time is almost 9 minutes faster thus I’ll claim winner on progress for year over year.

I guess it doesn’t matter that I couldn’t make the race. The hills were awful. The walk to the start line in the woods is a workout in itself. One could say you’re tired before you even start. This was more of a disappointment than my injuries to date. Go figure. For June I will add in hill training as a little nod to the race that wasn’t in the cards this year!

Not a ton of miles for June but I didn’t quit.

No stopping me now.

How will my second half differ from the first? 

Will my mileage pick up volume?

The half way point of the year is here. Holy cow. Committing six months to running takes dedication, time, and a can do attitude at the very least. Now it’s time to see what it takes to get to twelve months and really dial in on marathon training. We shall call this the building capacity phase. 

Will my mileage double by year’s end?

Will I get close to 750 miles?

Will I battle more injuries?

 Will I continue?

challenges, dare to be different

Life Over 50

2chicksandapen

I never really thought much about life over 50. Well I did think it’s half way to 100 and I’m going to live well beyond 50. That is about the extent of my thoughts.

Now I am here and there are some great parts of life to celebrate and some parts that are down right shitty. I normally wouldn’t gravitate to the shitty side of life however I decided it’s worth writing about it. Mainly because others might benefit from this rant and I’ll have a placeholder to look back on.

Menopause. The word. Why does it even start with men! Why just why?

I’m 52 and change. I have my normal aches and pains. I also have my daily inconveniences. I need to use the bathroom more frequently. Sometimes even more urgently than others. Many times in the middle of the night. I know I’m not alone. This is probably high on the list of inconveniences since it impacts daily life.

The water cooler talks or should I say the womanly chats are not about what your favorite dinner spot is anymore! It’s more of what supplements are you taking? What are your symptoms? What’s working? What’s not working? Are your joints hurting? The list goes on and on. This stage of life I wasn’t ready for. I blinked and menopause was at my doorstep. Front and center.

Irregular cycles. The inconsistency can drive you crazy. Flat out crazy. Fatigue one day. Sleepless the next. As I write it’s 3am. I should be tired. I am tired. However I can’t sleep. I really can’t even get comfortable in bed. Nobody is awake to know I’m just sitting here idle. A new kind of alien time. How I used to sleep as in body positioning is now uncomfortable. My favorite pillow makes me hot now. My blankets are just right one minute. Then I’m hot, hot, hot. Zero consistency. Let me say that louder for those in the back. I have zero consistency in many areas of life in this phase.

Men. O. Pause. Men can pause. They can hit pause and run away. They can be supportive. They can think you are bat shit crazy. In the blink of an eye your normal is now a new normal and it’s hard enough to adjust to for you. What about others around you? Life is messy and I will say this is definitely a messy stage. Are you supported? Does your family think you have lost your grip on life?

The annual checkups get more complex. A mammogram. A colonoscopy. A full body skin check. A bone density scan. The list goes on and on. How does one even manage  without good insurance?

Somehow women push through the difficult stages of life. The teen years and all that goes along with it. Motherhood and the body changes, if that is your route. Raising kids and balancing life. Shifting to aging with grace. I’m in the aging with grace stage. The it’s time to have adult fun but balance with the blah of aging.

As I live through the muck of this stage of life I control what I can. My nutrition. My physical activity. My mental wellness. My circle of friends. My energy sucks. I choose wisely each day. It’s a requirement. If today I can sleep 9 hours, I choose sleep because another day this week I might not be so lucky. If I can get in an extra workout one day, I do it because the next two I might be sidelined. 

I’m adapting to change. I’m saying yes to the unknown. I’m saying a shift in my routine is okay. This is how I’m managing my chaos. Adaptability for me may be different than others. I’m 100% okay with that. If I don’t fit the box for someone around me, that’s okay too. I’m not a fit for everyone at every moment.

I have a plan for my day today to start at 7am. What happens at 10am, 2pm and 5pm may be different than I envisioned. Why? Well I may be tired from being up most of the night.  My body may say no thanks to what I originally planned. I may get moody and want to avoid people. This is a real fact of this stage and I am definitely a people person yet I like to avoid people sometimes. I’m adapting.

Adapting to change comes with other challenges. Impulsivity. The need to do something now. Immediately. My timeline not yours. Or maybe it’s stubbornness. No. No. No.  I’m not going x. I’m not doing what you want. It’s just a game of no, no, no. I could go on and on about this topic but I will hit pause.

I will pause here for women. I will say take a deep breath. Inhale that deep breath. Exhale that toxic air that seems to be hindering you today. It will probably come back again tomorrow and the next day. It’s life. It’s a phase. Just breathe through it. That’s what I’m doing. I’m taking the good with the bad. I’m breathing in the sunshine and exhaling the bullshit.

I’m celebrating me. Many may not understand this phase of life if they haven’t hit the wall. The men-o-pause wall. The wall men want you to pause at. Do you reflect and move on? Do you cower and seek refuge? As a strong and fiercely independent woman, I pause. I study. I reflect. I change. I pivot sometimes on what seems like just my big toe and I jump. I lunge forward to what’s next. What’s waiting for me, because that’s all I know.

I know to enjoy what life is left. Live life to the fullest. Tomorrow isn’t guaranteed thus I will plunge forward. Look for my travel stories. Watch me adventure. My why will always be why not.  If you are reading this and feel stuck, get unstuck. Book a trip. Take a long walk. Find a new hobby. Find your joy. Do what makes you happy because you are living in this body of yours. Not the person next to you!

Stop comparing yourself to others. Don’t worry if you don’t fit the mold another wants. You focus on your survival of this stage in life. The people who stick around in this transitional phase are the true keepers in life. 

perspective

Let it Go

2chicksandapen

Recently I heard a comment about growth. I wasn’t thinking the growth was really my growth, rather the growth of another. Boy was I wrong.

I had to take some time to think about the growth opportunity. We were at a crossroads of sorts. Her learning to fly. Me letting her fly solo throwing caution to the wind. Whether near or far as a mom you always have a eerie sense of worry for your kid. It never really goes away. My mom is in her eighties and she still feels the worry of her kids.

Nonetheless,  adjusting my comfort zone to let another sink or swim on their own was as much about my growth as hers. As you have a child become an adult, you can only hope they remember every life lesson you gave them. Direct or indirect lessons of all kinds. The life experiences along the way. The life lessons that should influence solid decision making. That is just so easy to say. The reality is always much different.

Despite what you teach along the way, it is ultimately on them to find their moral compass. To make good choices. To surround themselves with a tribe that is good company. Sometimes this doesn’t happen on day one. Sometimes there are mistakes or bumps along the way as they spread their wings.

All you can do is guide, cheer and support from a distance. The passenger seat. You don’t get to choose their spouse. You don’t get to choose if they have kids. You don’t get to choose where they live. Your life and role in their life shifts. This is as much about your growth as theirs.

Girls may grow through this phase of life at different speeds than boys. No two kids are the same despite the same upbringing. I should know this myself just by looking at myself and my siblings as adults. So many differences yet same household growing up. Each of us took different paths. Each totally different lifestyles. None of which are wrong. Just different.

I’ve been at peace for a while on what I can control. What I can teach in the final days. What could be on the horizon. Once that peace is engrained in my mind, I am able to focus on what’s next for me.

This is my growth opportunity. New hobbies. Time to travel. Goals to achieve. Time to prep for my next adventure stage of life. Things will be different. There will quieter times. There may even be gaps in excitement. This is where I again need to refocus on what’s important for me now. How do I grow?

Cleansing my mind.

Letting go.

Closing my eyes to see what I desire.

The day dreaming.

The growth.

The opportunities.

My time has arrived. 

Her time of need is in the shadows.

Off to college she goes. Off to master life as an empty nester for me. Each flying solo in their way. Why did it take me to today to realize this? 

Off we go.

New chapters loading.

Out with the old.

In with the new.