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health, working women

A Girl in Uniform

“If you ever get lost or need help, look for someone with a name tag or uniform on.”

These are the words we told our kids at places like Disney World when they were little, just in case. People in uniforms should be able to help.

I’m an avid sports parent. I love to show up and watch my daughters play, no matter the sport, no matter the team. I even try to go cheer for them when they are coaching or officiating games. Both of my daughters are refs for girls lacrosse.

Recently, one of my daughters had the honor of officiating youth championship games. I showed up to watch her in action. Hundreds of little kids, googles falling off, uniforms that don’t quite fit on their tiny bodies, all trying to get the hang of a sport I love, it brought back so many good memories. Games on Saturdays. Cheering for your team. Trophies and snacks after the game. And my daughter, once a youth player, now the ref.

Being a ref is not for the faint of heart. I know my attitude toward refs changed when my older daughter became one. Suddenly the heckling from the fans and coaches felt very personal. Why are they attacking her? Do they really think she is being paid by one team to make those calls? Don’t they know she’s a human and can hear their nasty insults? And if she can’t, I can?

My daughters each have very different personalities but they exude a cool, calm confidence on the field. They address irrational adults when necessary. It seems it is always the adults, very rarely the players who are ill-behaved. Unfortunately, bad behavior by at least a couple of adults is more the rule than the exception at these games.

In the end, though, it’s about the players. I remind them that the little girls are looking up to them. They are learning how to be fair. How to accept small setbacks like fouls and share the wins with their team. They are learning how to lead from a girl like them, just a few years further down the road.

I also tell them that some of the best refs are also teachers. Each of my daughters has almost a decade of field playing on their resume. They often know much more about the game than the coaches and spectators. So when a young high school team kept making the same fouls over and over, my daughter offered to demonstrate ways to prevent getting those fouls. They share knowledge and grow the game.

It’s a proud mama moment for sure, to see my girls nurture young players through their role. I cheer for the refs.

Before the championships, I called my youngest over to the fence for a quick pregame chat and picture. A minute later, a little girl, goggles half off, uniform all askew, came up and got her attention. My daughter walked her to the stands, helped her find her parents, then waited by the fence until her dad returned from the car. The little girl needed a jacket during warm ups.

I love that this little girl still thought to ask someone in uniform to help her. Despite what some adults might tell you, the ref is there to help.

health

Losing the Crown

Most think of royalty and a crown. Maybe even a Crown and Coke. I hate to let you down with the title today. For me it was a dental crown that was lost and this is how the story goes.

It’s not really a topic of conversation to speak about your existing crown outside of the dentist office. However on this day, my crown wanted to tell its own story.

It wanted to let me know it was annoyed at the dental hygienist that I let clean my teeth that morning. The crown didn’t like the extra poking and prodding she did. Come to think of it, neither did I. And for the record I am not a huge fan of any dentist, but I know I’m not alone there.

My crown let me know about it when I went to eat a snack later that day. She threw a tantrum of sorts. She bucked up, flung herself around my mouth with my food. Almost causing me to choke on the lovely porcelain crown. That would have been interesting cause of death I am sure.

Anyway, I was able to save the crown and myself simultaneously. An Irony I know. It was hard work but I did it and I’m here to recount the story. Out comes the crown and there lies a bare spot. A nub of tooth. An ugly spot. A very ugly gap if I do say so myself.

Thankfully the crown is hidden in the back of my mouth so most won’t notice. But of course I notice it. I feel it with my tongue. I feel it when I accidentally eat something on that side of my mouth. I feel it when brushing my teeth. I just know what’s missing. Losing a crown of any kind is shameful.

It’s such an annoyance to lose a crown. Now I have to wait patiently for the dentist to squeeze me in to have it reglued. Hopefully they will use Gorilla Glue this time to avoid future issues.
For now I’ll smile a little less until my grill and crown has been restored to its highly functioning self.

No pictures in this post as I wouldn’t want to scare anyone! Maybe I need a crown and coke to take the edge off my pain and suffering.

Another day. Another story. Go ahead and laugh at my expense. It was my hope to make you giggle my the end of this story. It’s as real as it gets.

fitness and nutrition, health

Road to 5-0 and beyond

The road to fifty isn’t always so nifty. When you approach the big 5-0, many shifts take place. Your body. Your mind. Sometimes your zip code. Maybe even your friend circle.

Maybe it’s mood swings that hit today. Maybe it’s body changes next week. Maybe it’s aches and pains ongoing. Maybe it’s stress in life. Maybe it’s nothing. Maybe it’s all of the above. Maybe it hits all at once.

Maybe you become forgetful. Maybe you just seem over emotional on days. Maybe you are bloated. Maybe you move slower. Just maybe you are getting old. Gender doesn’t matter when it comes to aging.

There really isn’t a guide book for a mid life crisis. There isn’t an age point either. There isn’t a how to manual for menopause or grumpy man syndrome. There isn’t a road map to feeling old. For me I just want to age gracefully and keep up with what I still want to do each day.

It seems many in their fifties are starting to see signs of aging. Maybe the fast food is catching up with one pal while melanoma is rearing its ugly head with another. This is the time to do the breast checks. The annual physicals. The colonoscopy. The dirty list nobody really wants to pay attention to.

The next ten years will be the shoulder surgeries. The knee replacements. The second laundry list nobody wants to contend with. Getting old. Make sure you are treating your body like the temple it is. You only have one. Pay attention to any warning signs that rear their ugly heads.

I take each day as it comes. I try to live life to the fullest. I try to seek out adventures. I like to stimulate my mind. I like to tire myself out with fitness at some point in the day so I can sleep well at night.

I try to tune out negative people in my life. I have no room to waste mental energy on negatives. It will never help me make it through my road to 50-60-70 and beyond. 

adventure, health

Feeling Beachy

A quick trip to the beach was on the radar for this girl. Not a long stay by any means, but an escape. A quick change of scenery.

A little salt in the air. Sunshine on the skin and sand in the toes. There is no better medicine. From the sound of the ocean to smell of the air to the beach vibe of the people. It all equates to relaxation.

In order to feel beachy, you need great accommodations. We found just the right place. This trip featured a cute little 2 bedroom house found on Airbnb. Definitely old fashioned by the exterior look and the bathroom’s dated tile but a lipstick renovation had been recently completed mixing the new with the old. It was perfect for our little stay.

Some of my favorite features were visible instantly. The location to the beach. The simple and quiet street. The two beach bikes sitting on the porch screaming ride me! The screened porch with comfy furnishings. These favorites will be memory makers without question.

I mean as soon as we pulled up two travelers eyed the bikes and went for a ride. I could hear the giggles as they navigated their way down the street in the night with a cellular flash light.

Then there were the bedtime giggles. These started after the claiming of beds, of course. The trouble makers were clearly together instigating giggles. The giggles and snorts went on and on. Then they stopped. Then they started again. The silence of the night crept in after the sounds of excitement. Finally. I believe everyone realized tomorrow will bring new adventures. Rest those weary eyes I said to myself.

Rest now. Play later. Now I will go dream about living my best beach life while I’m visiting this beautiful area with family and friends.

It’s always a peaceful place. The sounds, the imagery, the smells. The beach can easily be a reset button for the toughest of weeks or days prior.

perspective

Spanking

Do you believe spanking children is a form of discipline or would you consider it abuse?

I have never been a fan of spanking. I wasn’t spanked as a child and I turned out okay. However I know others who were subjected to spanking in their early days and speak of how it made them obedient.

Does the fear of harm or pain equate to obedience? If so, what does it teach a child?

-to fear things in life?

-to accept the way things are and never challenge or assert one’s beliefs?

-to respect those who raise a hand to you?

The latter makes me cringe honestly. To teach young developing minds that you respect anyone who raises their hand to you is just some thing that turns my tummy.

When I was raised I knew right from wrong. I didn’t always make the right choice but I knew what was right from wrong. I didn’t need the whooping of a belt or stick to understand. I heard disappointment in my parents’ voices and that was all I needed.

What happens if you are raised with spanking and your spouse is raised with no spanking? What path do those two take with their kids? Is one right or wrong?

This is a thought post. I don’t think spanking is necessary to teach youngsters. It’s a fear tactic. If it was a best practice wouldn’t schools use it? 

Then I think about the military and those raised in military families. Soldiers are expected to be obedient and follow directives. If one steps out of line they have some Sort of punishment that is normally physical in nature. Not a spanking but physically daunting in one way or another. Is spanking more prevalent in these households or those with military backgrounds?

I just wonder about many things and today my wandering mind visited the topic of spanking. I wonder if I’m a bad parent for choosing not to spank my kids or if I qualify for saint hood. What’s your take on spanking? I would really love to read private comments on the subject.

As we blog we cover many topics. Some topics are appreciated more than others. We don’t shy away from difficult topics and we hope you don’t either. Drop us a line any time on this post or another. We do review all comments we receive.