coaching, family

Vroom Vroom

The engine has started. The permit is in hand. She checks the mirror to make sure she looks cute. Yup, that’s a correct statement. Here we go. The car is in motion with a teen operating the vehicle!

Month one is here. We make it to the highway. We hit the country roads. We yielded in many scenarios. We drove in the dark. We even drove in the rain. We got gas and she pumped. Big deal for her. We passed a cop which made her super nervous.

My favorite trip was to Chick-fil-A. She wanted to maneuver the drive thru, place her order herself, pay and make sure she could get to the window to get the food. That ending part wasn’t so pretty but the long arm reach was fun to watch. She was sad however when she realized she couldn’t eat the hot food while driving.

So many firsts for her. So many stressful situations for me. We are working on it together. We have time to focus without distractions. It’s been a good first month. Well I should say most of the month was good. A few disagreements on what is left and what is right. I figured that was a prerequisite for the permit but I might have assumed too much. I guess when under pressure you might hear go right and go left?

I’ve decided to document this roller coaster ride with her because it’s time I won’t get back. It’s a memory I won’t be able to recreate. It’s a time to build her up and coach her on something that will give her independence, achievement and a right of passage. She is my youngest child. My last time to make an impact on roadway safety.

From the copilot seat, I survived some more miles of behind the wheel training. I’m learning new ways to cope with stress, anxiety and fear. All of which I don’t normally have to deal with unless I’m buckling that seatbelt to go for a ride with permit girl.

Until next time. Drive safely. Be patient if you see a slow driver. They could be learning to drive.

challenges

Right of Passage

Obtaining a permit to drive a vehicle is such a rush for teens. A ready-set-go button you press for independence. It happens immediately for them. Much later for the parents.

We as adults know all too well there is much to learn. Time behind the wheel is required. Exposure to weather elements. Exposure to traffic. So many variables. Corrections, discussions, modifications and so on. Yet for some odd reason teens think their parents know absolutely nothing. Nothing about life let alone driving.

Lord help me: I have a new permitted driver. One who knows all but listens to nothing. It is going to be a long and grueling process for both of us. Many lessons to learn. Many challenges to overcome.

For now I’m working on my breathing techniques while in the car, while the car is in motion, and when the vehicle is stopped. This includes sighs, giggles, OMG and potential curse words. If I focus on breathing I am less likely to do the above which the trainee can feel.

Random post for today.

challenges

Visual Cues

Today’s visual cue is my time tracker. It’s been in a drawer for a good while now as it had served its need for a past project.

Now here we are today, in the present. A new project of sorts has taken flight. A new visual cue and tracker was just what was needed. The timer was set for 180 days or six long months. It was a pain to reset but it worked. It had be dusted off to get ready for the action.

Now the fun part begins. It’s the journey. The 180 days of possibilities. The many triumphs. The possible failures. Basically everything in between. These days are where memories will be made. Progress to document. Trials and errors to tweak along the bumpy road. Adventures will be had I’m sure.

The point to this story is to share my method. My method of holding myself accountable for a duration of time. A timer I won’t touch or change. A timer I will refer to when I need to know how much longer I must endure. How much success I already accomplished just in the form of time invested. It’s a process. This is just one piece of the accountability pie that’s involved in the new project. It’s part of the vision. The intricacies.

Rome wasn’t built in a day. We have all heard that. Millionaires are not born over night. There is a process. Patience is built into the equation. Time is normally a factor. Measurement is a key ingredient as well in any recipe for success. And we can’t forget the planning. You need to have a plan and work your plan.

At the end of the day I’m chipping away at a tedious task-driven project. One I will want to bang my head against a wall a time or two but I will have my visual cues to help me over the speed bumps. One step closer to the finish line.

We all need a push now and then. Today my push is time. The time clock. Not so much a sprint rather a long-distance race against the mind. Who will win?

My money is on me. I only take the sure bets. I’ve said it before: the mind is a powerful tool. Do you use your mind to maximize your time and efforts?

Did you notice the stickers? They add emotions to my visual cue because I know there will be trying times ahead. To combat that future desire to fail or quit, I hope the humor of the emoji stickers will remind me of why I accepted the project. Just a tidbit of my thought process or note to my future self.

family, Teddie Aspen

Dog Lessons

It wasn’t long ago I was digging through boxes leftover from my childhood home. I ran across an American Kennel Club certificate. Maximillian was his name.

I had heard his name many times in my life, often with a sneer from one of my brothers. They loved their dog, and I was the reason we got rid of him. Maximillian, the prized pooch, couldn’t stop knocking me over as a newly walking toddler. So, he had to go.

All this to say, I didn’t grow up with dogs. I had a cat named Snoopy I treasured but was allergic to (a story for another post), but never a dog. I just didn’t get dogs. Never wanted one. And who knows, maybe I was even a little scared of them from all my hard knocks as a babe.

As an adult, when my family wanted to get a dog, I resisted. We even had a dog live with us for a while that didn’t really work out. We ended up taking him to a new home where he could have the room and attention he needed.

Then Penny came along. My sister-in-law became her unexpectedly permanent foster mom. She needed a place to live and a family to love her. Would we be interested? I didn’t really want this at all. We could take her for a 2-week trial to see if we could handle it.

And she never left. We live together but I wouldn’t say she loves me. Still, my heart softened seeing how much everyone else loved her. She changed our family.

And then came the dog that I really did love. Chester. The unlikely, homely, wiry guy from the pound. The underdog. I didn’t even know why we would ever need 2 dogs. I was just getting used to 1! Then Chester who got scared by sudden movements and noises, Chester who always backed out of the room…Chester came along. He was very shy at first but eventually came around and became sweet, playful Chester. He loves to run and bound through the woods, and his sad eyes will pull at your heart strings every time. Chester changed my heart about dogs.

Now there’s the newest member of the clan named Nash, who I’ve taken a liking to. I even embrace my extended family and friend’s dogs. Heck, I even get to walk dogs and dog sit once in a while. Truthfully, I still don’t know how to act around dogs, and they can tell. It doesn’t come naturally for me and maybe never will. Thankfully, I’ve learned that many dogs are pretty forgiving if you at least try. They teach me about protection, loyalty, priorities and unconditional love. They seem to bring out the best in people just by being there and present in the moment. That bowls me over in the best of ways.

fitness and nutrition

5-10-15-20

Counting by fives is easy. You can count quickly with this method. Could counting by fives ever have a negative effect? Can you reverse a negative effect?

Let’s look at a 5-pound fluctuation on the scale. It is not a big deal to many. A scale can fluctuate and 5 pounds is a good cushion for many splurges or environmental issues. I’m in agreement. Up or down five is considered acceptable.

Now let’s just say you were fluctuating on the high side on the scale. You know that but you add 5 more pounds. Technically that’s 10 pounds in total but since you are counting by fives the justification is it’s just five pounds.  Not a big deal, right? 

It happens again. Now that totals 15 pounds but really it was just five pounds, right? What I’m getting at is counting by fives could diminish the big picture number if you look at things a certain way. Like by just 5 here and there. It’s easy to do if you are not paying attention or are choosing to look the other way for whatever reason. That’s why many long term weight loss programs require tracking. Without that measurement stick it’s easy to get off track.

I’m not a big scale person. I mean I don’t like to look at it daily as it becomes a consuming and daunting task. However for those who watch their weight to an extent it’s a needed measurement tool. One of many tools.

For me, I have been off my macro counting for a good bit (over a year).  Wanting to see how I fared eyeballing things. I did well. I could handle it. What I learned when I meticulously watched my macros was instilled in me. A routine. A habit. I was strong and consistent.

However, when I’m not tracking it’s easy to add in an ice cream, a candy, a drink, and other small items that add up in time. The 5, 5, 5 scenario…

Before you know it, five becomes ten, ten become fifteen and so on. For me counting by fives can have a negative connotation. During Corona I counted by five. I counted more than once by five. It added up.

The good news is I didn’t let fives multiply to the point of no return. I shook myself and said let’s get back on track and count macros to reverse by fives. I will use the scale as a tool. I’ll use my measuring tape to monitor inches and I will use myfitnesspal to track my intake daily until I’ve reversed the effects of just 5 pounds. I know how to do it. I just need to buckle down. Take the task on. Own it. 

We all have our own challenges of maintaining the physical / mental balance that’s right for each of us at each stage of life. Pandemic included! For me, I know my happy place on a scale, in inches and in macros. I just need to be diligent in staying the course even when a pandemic hits. Basically eliminate excuses and although a treat is okay here and there. I need to choose what’s worth the indulgence vs. slipping into a 5, 5, 5 scenario.

Another tale of how to saddle up and put in work. Success is something you work for and sometimes you have to work for it multiple times. Trust the process. Learn each time. Counting by fives in reverse. That’s how I got here. That’s how I will get back to my starting point. No big deal. Just need to practice some patience while being consistent.

For some reason I think counting backwards by five is much more difficult than adding by five. What an irony. With all that being said it’s not hard to get started. Just takes a little self motivation.