perspective

Are you Broken?

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On any given day we are all a little broken. It could be a simple hangnail type of broken, a big breakup type of broken or anything in between.

Some days we break a little, like a small crack in your cell phone. Some days we seem to be broken in a million and one pieces like the shattering of a mirror. Fortunately for us, there are bandaids for little boo boos, bandages and Advil for bigger cuts and bruises and then there is always the gym, counselors and good friends to help you when the heavy kind of broken happens. Loss of a loved one, divorce, mental breakdown, financial losses can all leave one broken which is just part of life but we all need to find coping mechanisms to deal with brokenness.

Remember, everyone can break. It’s not a sign of weakness. One can break at 2 years old resulting in a tantrum. One can break in their teens when social struggles hit hard. One can break as an adult for many reasons and the elderly can even break. Caring for an aging family member takes a big toll on people but many don’t talk openly about it. Being broken offers an opportunity to realize change is needed.

I’m sure we all wish we could sprinkle pixie dust on our brokenness and it all just goes away.  In reality, it’s not that simple. It takes strength, wisdom, encouragement, time and perseverance to realign with what’s important and needed to move ahead when brokenness hits us.

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(photo by @ahborson)

One may find hope with Jesus and the church. Another may exit a bad relationship and find peace in forging ahead alone. Another may readjust financially to a setback with counseling or help from a friend. In each scenario options are visible. Taking a step may be hard but if a step is never taken one will never move forward and may be burdened with sadness and sorrow from the brokenness.

I describe brokenness to my kids as we all have an emptiness inside of us.  And some of that comes from the broken places that we all seem to collect throughout life…  Seeing that things aren’t perfect. Accidents happen with awful consequences.  Humans are messy and flawed. People let us down or fail us. We lose someone we care about, for whatever reason. Each of these leaves us cracked, spilling, a little emptier.

It’s up to each of us what we fill those broken spots with.  Will it be productive or destructive? Some will fill that emptiness with substances, addiction.  Some will fill it with meditation, yoga, religion. Some will fill it with giving.  Some with an empty kind of busy-ness. Some with hopelessness or detachment. Some may write their way through grief to a deeper understanding of themselves. Some will fill their lives with new or deeper relationships, reflection, and a true attempt to find joy in the brokenness.  We each choose how we fill those cracks, whether we choose carefully or consciously or now.  We choose how we mend ourselves and even others.

I read about the Japanese art of Kintsugi. It’s the centuries-old practice of repairing broken ceramic pieces with gold…in this tradition, the cracked and repaired spots are not blemishes, but make the piece more beautiful and unique.  It’s a powerful metaphor for our broken human life. Our cracks don’t mean we are useless. Instead, they are part of what make us precious and ultimately more valuable.

I am broken. I have repaired cracks in my life journey and I have many stage one cracks in my life now. I am content with my brokenness. Life is not perfect and neither am I. I grow through my life lessons. I wander. I encourage. I challenge. I test fate and when I do I risk it all. The risk could be emotional. The risk could be financial. The risk could be unknown.

If I lived in a bubble could I still break? Yes, of course. I can however control my attitude when I start each day. I can manage my emotions when times are tough and I can fuel my body with health and fitness regimens that help me stay the course. It’s all in the mindset.

It may be hard to share, but I find that when I am brave enough to share my broken, I often also get the chance to be closer to people.  So often, others are suffering in ways we don’t know or can’t see, even refuse to see.  If we take a risk, make ourselves vulnerable, show our tender spots to a trusted friend, we will often learn we are much less alone in our broken. Many are fighting battles we can’t imagine, and often they feel they are fighting them alone. The cracks are opportunities to shine a light on others and share a light in what can be a very dark time. Be the light and share your broken.  Be the gold that fills another and reflects their unique beauty.

Be the gold that fills the cracks. Your gold may melt different than mine but it doesn’t decline in value. Gold is precious just like you and me.

If you thought this post was meaningful, please share it. Share the words that speak to you. I know there are some keys phrases in this post that make me smile and work towards being a better person. I am always filling my cracks with gold and trying to help others find their gold to fill their cracks as well.

 

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(photo by @svklimkin)
hustle, perspective

The Chase Begins With You!

When you are an influencer who shares, you’ll always have people following you. Whether they say it out loud or not, they are watching. Some will imitate you, some will sit in judgment of what they know so little about. Some will want to be you or with you, in your circle. Some will admire, emulate, and learn. Some just won’t get it.

This happens daily to many but most won’t talk about it. Haters are always around. Kindness is also in front of you. Some choose by default. Others choose because they are uncertain about themselves. No matter where one fits on the spectrum, one just needs to focus on themselves. Treat others the way you would want to be treated. Laugh. Smile. Be genuine when you can. Those who fake it normally show their ugliness in one way or another. Be proud of who you are and what you bring to this world. Just you.

When you engage with your audience, your circle, your friends, your network, your acquaintances, sometimes you’ll be teaching, explaining. Sometimes just laughing, engaging. But within all that noise and engagement, you also have to have someone to chase.

Find someone better than you, in whatever field you are striving in. Business, fitness, social media, even close relationships or friendships. Who do you admire? Who has better skills? Who can you strive to be like?

Don’t mistake a chase for a competition. It’s just the chase. Chase the better version of you not another. You can only compete with yourself in this scenario. In a 50-yard dash you can race to win, but in life you need to focus on developing you and the world only gets one you. It’s up to you to define what you look like today, tomorrow and the next day. The physical you is just one piece of the puzzle.

It could be lunges or toes-to-bar at the gym. It could be the way a person writes or talks to their clients. It could be how a person styles their outfit or cooks in the kitchen. Find that person and chase them. Let them urge you on to a better version of yourself.

You may not even have to tell them. In some cases, it may not even be someone you know that well. In great cases, they might serve as a partner or mentor for you. But, you could also watch from afar and learn and strive that way.

If you are a shining light, you impact others just by being you and pushing forward on your path. Look in the mirror and find your light. Share the light with the world and see what happens.

I dare you to be different. Stand out. You have just one life to live, make it one to remember.

#1095Days #choosedaily #2chx

dare to be different, hustle

You Can Be Part of My Story…

Read on to see what it requires to be part of my story…

19.4 is white heavy check mark off in the history books for this girl. I thought this was a one-and-done workout for me, but here it is Monday and this whimsical girl decided to give it another go. I may be crazy but I did it. I knew I wouldn’t die, but I could improve my performance. 

Burpees are not my favorite so I said I’ll take my best effort on the first attempt and not redo it on Friday. Then I got to reflecting on my inner battle with self-improvement and said I should redo it Sunday. I was lazy Sunday so it didn’t happen. I had travel for work Monday so that wasn’t an option for redoing the workout. I felt unsettled about my effort and performance to an extent.

I had some time to think on my road trip. Just me and some tunes in the car. Jammin’ to a classic song playlist. Funny how music can be therapeutic. My mind was settled. I got creative. It was in that moment of clarity that the rippling effect hit me. Just like that, I rewinded the week. What a week. So much inspiration. A snapshot of highlights in my mind. So many stories to share. Where do I begin?

Then a fluke event happened and my travel plans were interrupted. I had time to make it to the gym Monday night. Fate would have me WOD 19.4 again after many hours crammed up in a car, sedentary. I basically blinked and opportunity knocked. I had to seize the moment. Unplanned events make for the best memories.

Before I break down my workout, I need to explain my version of the rippling effect. You see, people often tell me I inspire them. Whether it be through my physical actions or through my words in books or this blog. That just gets me in the gut. It fuels my soul. It inspires me to keep on going and broaden my reach. My desire to share more and impact many more. The puzzle piece Screen Shot 2019-03-19 at 7.08.12 AM of life.

With that being said, I have many people in my life who inspire me. I can’t name them all here but those reading this may know who they are, even if they remain nameless. One person person can inspire another which causes a rippling effect. I inspire to desire better for me and others. Once one person sees how they can inspire another, the benefits are magnified and the rippling begins. One by one.

This week I saw a photo that captivated many. A gym photo shot by the talented Milagros. That photo showed fatigue, grit and passion all rolled into one small photo. That photo reached far and wide and had a rippling effect. This photographer is amazing and she has caught me in action plenty of times already with many more to come. Her storytelling is through pictures and those pictures inspire others to see their value from a lens they don’t normally have the opportunity to view. #inspiring

Due to my schedule mishap, I wasn’t at my regular class time on Monday and I got the pleasure of meeting Jeremy.  Jeremy is one cool dude but full of inspiration. He works out with a modified workout each week, but it was amazing to watch. I didn’t plan to watch him. It just happened as I recovered from my death WOD. Jumping rope stationary with bands. Rowing elevated. Dumbbells used strategically. This week’s unplanned event allowed me to meet a new face and a new inspiration. I hope to share more about Jeremy in the future if and when our schedules align again. Jeremy was the cherry on top this week for my rippling effect. #unplannedimpact

Another post from an influencer online took me on a walk down memory lane. How two people can be so different on the surface yet harness the same inner strength. It was a vision that was hidden in plain sight.  You almost had to step back to see it. The take away from that post was “Never judge a book by its cover.” We all do that at some point but beauty is within and sometimes you have to look beyond to see what’s hidden in plain sight. Dig deeper inside to see the true story (this includes people). We all have the power to influence and inspire one another directly and indirectly.

Another gal pal at my gym pushed me when I didn’t think I had any push left in me. That person didn’t even have a clue they were inspiring me. That person is nameless for the purposes of this blog because it signifies more than one gal pal throughout the week. But then again, it’s not just gal pals. It’s the dudes. The big muscle dudes that have abs and then more abs. They inspire me to be the best version of me. They don’t see me as a 47- year-old mom tossing the bar weight around like a chicken with her head cut off. They see me as an athlete looking to get to the next level. Just working hard each day to get better. High fives, fist bumps, kudos, smiles, etc. all go a long way. Fostering community is free. Being nice is free. Inspiring others is free. Yet in today’s world some people miss those free opportunities.

Last but not least, I have kids. Three to be exact. Each of them special in their own way. They each inspire me and my desires more than they will ever know or understand. Their perseverance through tough times, injuries and heartache show me hope and wisdom. I recycle the hope and wisdom and share it with others in meaningful ways. Another form of the rippling effect. #lifelessons

All of the inspiration and perseverance this week led me to desire better or more of myself. Time was on my side and a window of opportunity arose for another crack at 19.4. Would I do better? Could I do better? Should I even chance it? Absolutely!

I started out warming up my SNATCH. For those of you who don’t CrossFit, it’s a real thing. From there I went to figuring out my burpee options for getting over the bar without falling on my face. I consulted and practiced with a few people for variations. I still had to figure out what would work for this 47-year-old that had 185 pounds to move over that bar after a burpee. The rest of the time I figured I would stare at the bar and pretend I could do a bar muscle up. I didn’t stare at it actually. I pulled up and failed a few times but my arms and shoulders were toast anyway. #muscleupgoals

That’s it folks, nothing exciting to report this week for this girl. I got inspired. I put in work. I exercised my patience muscles. I made new friends. I didn’t die, but I completed the 19.4 WOD Rx not once, but twice. I know I do much more each week than many my age and I share these stories online.  My actions of sharing my story may help one person see their inner beauty and inspire a desire to be their best.

On the flip side, I am super proud that this year I have hit the Rx button for 3 of the past 4 workouts and for the one that I scaled I actually completed it before the time cap. I couldn’t be more happier with my results and as of now I am in the top 20% of my age group which isn’t too shabby for this girl. The OPEN for me is a health check. No different than the fat truck test I do each year. It’s a personal measurement of me, myself and I.  See my progress pic from the past three OPENS. It shows hard work does pay off in time.

As I reflect on the OPEN this year I get to look back at how far I have personally come in the past year with regard to endurance, skills and strength. At the same time I get to see how much further I can go and what I need to do myself to level up. This is my OPEN story and it matters to me. One more OPEN post for you next week.

bar muscle-ups
strict handstand push-ups
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pull-ups

Those are just a few of the skills I am diligently working to master. I am not perfect by any means. I have to work at things to master them. It may take a year or it may take several weeks to learn these skills. I will be chipping away at these and will work on my weaknesses in time. Wish me luck with the final OPEN WOD. Will I be able to Rx it? Will I be able to stay in the top 20%? Will I stay injury free?

Be part of my book: until my next post I challenge you to inspire just one person. Capture the moment and share your story. Most people have social media. Tag 2 Chicks and a Pen (#2CHX) in your post. Your inspiration story might just make my #1095Days project. Submit your story today. You may become part of my upcoming book. I dare you to be different. Post online your inspiration to desire. #1095Days

I guess you will have to stay tuned for my final open post to see how I fare. Working on my top 20% goal.