Tag: mental health

dare to be different

Stripped

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Have you ever thought about stripping your life down to the basics? Wiping away the comforts of this or that and replacing those with wonder and curiosity? I didn’t really think about this per se but I made a plan and took action and the reality is I was stripped. 

I wasn’t stripped naked as in bare skinned. I was less full of the extra fluff in life. Down to the bare minimum allowing myself to immerse in new surroundings. I spent some time in nature. I enjoyed deer up close and to show how close I snapped a pic of their doo doo. Yes I’m that weird. I listened to sounds. Sometimes just the quiet of the day or the night. The peaceful air when stripped lets you reflect a little differently. No TV blaring. No dogs barking. No kids demanding attention. I even met some nice new people but I also met some folks that were not as nice. The latter being a great view of people weighed down in life. 

Peeling back the onion on people. How an environment can cause somebody to be bitter or how life can just make a person salty for this reason or that reason. At the end of the day I choose my reaction to those that may be in their salty stage of life! I can choose to greet them with the mirrored version of themselves or I can sprinkle a little pixie dust on their day in hopes they may see light vs darkness in the rest of their day.

I had no idea how wild the feelings would be. A fresh slate to paint awaits. My four walls became an amazing canvas to paint my life sparkles on. No real boundaries. It like going off to college for the first time to experience life yet I have all the life experiences to apply to my new found canvas. Interesting and odd at the same time. Stripped is the new state I encourage for all those in the almost golden era. A new kind of naked. Some may fear the boldness associated with stripping but I embrace it in a full Monty kind of fashion.

A shift. A little distance. An awakening. A reset of the mind, the body and the soul. A feeling of thankfulness floats in the air. A rumble in the tummy indicates the hunger to see all that’s new and near. The jolt of energy that sparks the day knowing today is a new day full of what’s surprises lurking around the corner for me.

This rambling is about a life shift. A transition of living for my kids and what’s best for them to the collective space for me to start living those golden years before I am too old to embrace the wonder of today. I’m choosing to make those memories now to fill my memory bank for the days that I am forced to live viewing what’s in the rearview. That day may come, but until then I’m chasing what’s ahead vs dwelling on what’s behind.

Don’t let today pass you by. Try the new foods. Make the new friends. Join that club that stretches your comfort zone. Undo your comfort zone. Get naked in life! Be extraordinary. We have one life in front of us. We can make it an adventure or we can make it a carousel that just spins round and round.

Off to see what’s on today’s horizon.

celebrations, dare to be different

31 Days: The 2025 Edition

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Oh the beautiful life we are given and the blank slate we have to write our story as we live each day. For this reason and many more I am continuing my tradition of my list of 31. The list that summarizes a glimpse of my month or 31 days each year. It’s fun to see what makes the list, but it’s just as fun to review the lists of years past.

It’s a great way for me to see that I am constantly evolving and also for others to take a peek and see if they are stuck in a way or maybe want to feel enlightened to try x, y or z. I’m always moving forward but I’m always looking back to remember how far I’ve come. 

1-I put a property under contract.

2-I closed on said property.

3-I planned a relocation.

4-i planned a trip.

5-I booked a massage.

6-I ate brunch with friends.

7-I made some new friends.

8-I read a new book.

9-I did some writing.

10-I did some strategic planning.

11-I made some donations.

12-I had many hard conversations.

13-I dealt with plenty of adversity personally and professionally.

14-I played tennis in the frigid cold.

15-I was a Good Samaritan in an ice storm.

16-I played in snow not once but twice.

17-I spent time with my mom being silly.

18-I spoiled my dogs.

19-I got a BIG ASS calendar for 2025.

20-I spent a lot of money.

21-I watched Trump take his presidency.

22-I went to North Carolina.

23-I was assigned Lori as my tennis alter ego.

24-I dealt with a leaky windshield for the first time ever in a car.

25-I sold two motorcycles.

26-I ate some good home cooked meals.

27-I initiated several new projects.

28-I learned how to connect a stove to a smart house.

29-I worked hard to bring home the bacon.

30-I played equally hard outside the workplace.

31- I started the countdown to retire.

This year I didn’t really elaborate on any of the 31 items. Not really sure why I kept it simple, but I just did. When I reflect on my state of mind this month I’m summing it up as happy. 

I’m a at peace with so many things in life. I’m finally settled into the role of empty nester. It has been a process to get fully untethered, but it was worth the wait I suppose.

The blue skies.

The less travelled road.

The quiet car rides to new destinations.

The allure of chasing the new in life.

The freeing feeling of letting go of things.

The warmth of a good cup of coffee and

the ambiance that it’s entangled with.

Just a few notes for me to recall down the road. Nothing fancy, but a blissful state of mind. Off I go into the sunset somewhere day dreaming of what’s near but also what’s far. Just a day in my life to share.

#TinkRuns2024, challenges

My First Marathon

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So much anticipation has led up to this point. Specifically every day after my half marathon until now. 12 days of am I ready? Do I have everything? Should I start packing? How will I do away from home? Will my pit crew be annoyed with me? The course is ready, but am I?

Today is the day.

The big day.

My first and only marathon quest.

My bright idea for age 52!

A dooms day of sorts. Can I do this? Why did I sign up for this? Am I crazy? So many questions but the reality is I am here. I have several friends by my side. We are doing this. The months, days and hours leading up to this point have been full of so many memories. Just being here is an accomplishment for each of us. Nobody wants to think about a DNF (did not finish) but it’s entirely possible. At least it’s not a bunch of hills.

Now we get to take these steps today and prove to ourselves that we can finish what we started and trained for. Or in my case what we barely trained for. That our bodies are capable and we can do hard things. One by one we will cross our own barriers before we finish today. Our stories are different. Our training regimens were different. Our ages are different. However we all put on our racing shoes and number looking to achieve the same goal with thousands of others today. Completing the marathon. Becoming one of the 1% club.

Signing up alone is a big step.

Training is a huge commitment.

Mental toughness is required.

Patience and grace is much needed.

Nutrition and hydration is paramount.

Clothing must be well thought out and tested!

Shoes and socks need to be broken in.

So many little steps before the big day.

Then you may need to circle back to the mental toughness multiple times in this preparation process. It’s a given.

When it’s time to show up, that’s another hurdle.

When you need to find your pace and really sync into it for the duration, that’s commitment.

Pain will be involved for most of the process.

Staying consistent for 26.2 miles is straight out courage!

Will your electronics last?

Do I have all that it takes? Not sure yet. I know I can get half way for sure. I’m sure I can go a little more as well, but can I finish? That’s my goal. Only me.

Only me to rely on!

Only me can say it’s time to quit.

Only me can cross that finish line.

Only me can motivate myself ultimately….

Stay tuned for the next post in this series showcasing my epic day.

challenges

The Icky Stage

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I’m at a stage in life that seems challenging at best. It’s almost hard to breakdown each component but I decided I’d write about some of it.

First challenge is movement. In the past six weeks I’ve gone from feeling amazing to battling injury after injury or aches. It’s not been fun. It’s been painful many days. It’s also been humbling to be sidelined a bit from what I enjoy most. I guess that makes me agitated in other areas of life. 

I’ve been to the doctor. I’ve been to the doctor again. What’s changed? Did you have an accident? What caused this? Why doesn’t the firm or doctor ask if I’m having menopausal symptoms? I mean I get asked if this is a worker’s compensation injury every time!

I want to say thank you to menopause for the instant list of ailments but I can’t really conclusively prove it. I will however say my long list of ailments go hand-in-hand with what many women note as issues, or at least google tells me that and so do the one million ads that pop up on my phone. I just didn’t expect it to hit me full force without notice. Am I paranoid? Some days I feel that way. Am I a chronic complainer? Some days I feel like it. Do I have pain? Most days. Is this all a change from a short time ago? 100%

In the midst of change is also worry. The routine breast exam. Then the mammogram. Then there is the breast exam recheck. The extra squishing of the boobs to see if you have cancer. That sounds awesome, right? I’d say no it’s not fun. I’d also say it’s not fun to have more than once. Then it’s the ultrasound. A deeper dive into your boobs. What’s next a biopsy? Joyfully, nope. A probe into your breast to place a marker and obtain a tissue sample. I will definitely reframe this but amidst all else it just creates a shit show theme. For some it’s good news. For others it’s not and that process requires so much more than I can explain in this post.

As we move on to just being busy. Events galore. Year end wrap up on steroids for school events. Graduation parties. Travel. Endless to do items. The joy and fun of everyday is mainly bundled with have to appearances and must do now items. Exhausting is the word that comes to mind. Mentally. Physically. Emotionally. Add these items on to the icky menopausal stage of life and boom. One day you might cry. The next day you might scream. You might even enjoy your solitude. You might even forget stuff amidst a brain fog episode. Go figure.

Space. No personal space. With life being front and center, it’s full of people. Everywhere I turn. Work. Home. Gym. Store. Events. It’s peopley and when you are really overstimulated and over scheduled the last thing you want to deal with is people. Let’s face it people are messy and when you’re in my shoes people avoidance seems almost a necessity! Decompression time is a mental health checklist item these days. So is yoga and deep breathing exercises.

Today I’m celebrating a sleepless night.

Today I’m appreciative of having my body working at maybe 80%.

Today I’m avoiding people as in holiday gatherings because I can. 

Today I’m at peace.

Tomorrow I’m not looking forward to. It’s a work day. Less time to recover. More have tos.

As I close out this post I should note I started it a while ago. I revisited it and sometimes just stared at the content. Today I wrote a little more and decided to close it out. One of things I control in life is what I elect to write about and choose to publish. Some days I may think I over share. Some days I wish I shared more. The constant irony.

No matter the day, I’m always glad I have an outlet. An online journal that is open to others. I don’t care what the comments are. I just care that I was true to myself in the process.

Much love from the sleepless night crew. Much strength going to those working through menopausal symptoms. Much thanks to all those displaying patience and support to loved ones in the icky stage.

celebrations, challenges, change

31 Days – 5 Years Later

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5 long years ago I wrote a blog about the 31 days in January as a reflection point. Nothing fancy just a glimpse of life. What I might have thought was important at that time. What I might care to revisit later. A simple way to showcase my mindset at the beginning of year. Just a recap. 

Now that I am sitting here five years later I’m a little amazed and feeling fancy. I’m cataloging my life story as it unfolds. Moments I might have forgotten about are captured here in this blog. Five years is a long time. A lot of personal growth. A lot of loss. Many challenges. Many more triumphant moments. As I type away on my keyboard I will once again leave you will a list of 31 moments from my reel of life and some wisdom to go along with it as a bonus. I also love a good calendar humor to start each morning with breakfast. See photo below:

Don’t underestimate the power of starting your day with an out-of-the-box comment or thought to ponder. It gets you stirred up for the day. A little spark. Leverage technology and share with friends near and far and boom you have some instant memories to share. This is my little new year’s tip to you. I’m on about year three for flip calendar fun with friends. We all love it and love to see what new calendars we all start with in January. One day I’ll have my own I’m sure. May be just whispering that to the universe now. Stay tuned.

  1. Rehabbed a property in short order
  2. Listed and closed on property in 14 days

The above is nuts for a timeline. A little bit of luck. A lot of hard work. A positive mindset. An ability to engage resources was all critical. This will to date be one of my favorite quick projects to be a part of. However when I looked back in 2019 I was moving and shaking in real estate as well. A little irony.

  1. I began training as a distance runner.
  2. I logged a lot of miles.
  3. I hit personal bests running.

I don’t like to run but I opted to give myself a goal that would be challenging. I committed to tracking along the way to document the success and/or failures. So far so good. I’m not injured. I’m running happy. I’m confident in my progress. I’ve had a lot of personal growth this month as I pound the pavement with my Clydesdale-like body. 

  1. I did some fundraising for local sports.
  2. I did tax paperwork for business/personal.
  3. I paid bills.
  4. I worked out: CrossFit, pickleball & tennis.

These four items on the list are redundant for the most part. Requirements that surface with the new year. Never fun. Always boring and can be hard in different ways. I put in the work nonetheless. That’s the rule follower in me and consistent behavior girl. 

  1. Made time for family & friends.
  2. Checked in on those who are sick or challenged in life at the moment.
  3. Took some time off for just me.
  4. Bought some new shoes, of course.

Last year I had a lot of loss to reflect on. People who passed on. This year it seems more about health in general. Mental health issues for some. Serious medical conditions for others. Covid and flu hitting others very hard. I’m more worried about the longevity of some around me this year. Maybe that’s better than loss but the worry part I could do without.

  1. I met some new people.
  2. I traveled by plane.
  3. I experienced new things.
  4. I floated in my hot tub on cold days.
  5. And boy was it cold this month.
  6. I signed up for a half marathon.
  7. I signed up for a DEKA Fit competition.

Competing has been on my January logs in previous years as I usually sign up for the CrossFit Open. Which I did again this year for year #8 however, I’m also doing other events to diversify. Look at me! Fit and fabulous over fifty. How nifty is that?

  1. I would like to have more sunshine in January. My older skin needs the warmth of the sun more so than rain and cold.
  2. I played with my dogs a lot.  A real comfort point these days. Many hours with my dogs alone just enjoying each other’s company. Nothing more loyal than a fur friend. They usually even follow you willingly to the bathroom!
  1. I played the lottery. Not something I usually do but felt compelled to give it a go. I didn’t win. No surprise.
  2. I said farewell to a workout buddy and work partner. Not gone gone but far enough away to say it’s bye for now.
  3. I started mentally preparing for my big trip to Greece this year. Started the countdown now that 2024 is here.
  4. I also have a digital countdown for many other flagship events over the years. They seem to be stacked one on top of each over. This just means 2025 will be here before I know it.
  5. I reviewed at a quick glance my list from 2019, 2020 and 2021 just to see what’s different, if anything. Interesting task.
  6. I thought about what big moments I will have this year. Both planned and unplanned. Gives me a little excitement to think about the possibilities.
  7. I thought a lot about retirement. A new one for me. Where will I want to go. What will I want to do. When is the right time. What is the exit strategy. So many choices.
  8. What’s next? The dreamer in me asks. Ponders. Deliberates. Creates. Scribbles. Draws. Plans. Thinks some more. Ah the beauty of dreaming what can be. Then making it be reality. We all have that opportunity but many won’t take the chance on themselves. I do daily.
  9. Me. Just me. For once I’m thinking about me. My kids are adults. They are charting their paths. My significant other likes his things. I like mine. I’m doing more of my likes and wants. Filling those desires that maybe went on the back burner while other priorities were front and center.

This is me. Over the 50 year mark. Some don’t make it to this point. I’m looking ahead next year, 5 years, and beyond. Whether I get there or not is not the question. It’s what will I get to do before my time here is done.

I’m doing all that I can in the time I have left. I’ll report back next January but in the meantime enjoy my interim blogs and look for publications in the future because writing is just a part of my journey.

Feeling flirty.

Feeling fun.

Feeling fulfilled.

Feeling festive.

Feeling free.

It’s great to be in my world this January.

Wonder what you would put on your list of 31? Give it a try. You might surprise yourself. You might get to thinking it’s time to do something exciting with life.