author moments

Cranky Pants 2.0

Today I did something funny. I spun the dial on my app to revisit my blog posting from 1 year ago. What was my mindset? What was I writing about? Was I even writing?

I was indeed writing about being cranky and the post was titled Cranky Pants hence the title of today’s post. Now here is my update for today. I am not cranky at all. I am feeling purposeful, strategic and I glow.

Today I had a great day. It started out with my sweat sisters doing what we love. Working out in the early hours of the day pushing our body and mind to the limits. I had some play time with my pups which always takes any stress away. I met some great people at an event I hosted and I was able to make and impact today in my work. The work that I classify as my purposeful work. The work that simply provides joy for helping others. In a nut shell, I’m floating in my own little happy cloud celebrating the day.

Now I got a little curious to see what was on my mind in 2019, pre-pandemic. Well I was writing again. This time I was writing about my new-to-me black beach bike. I still love the bike but it has a flat tire so I don’t ride it as I should and I have a newer road bike that seems to get more mileage than the beach bike. I guess this is a reminder to book a beach trip so I can pack up my bike and take for a spin in some beach town. What a fun reminder.

Ah the beauty of blogging over time. I have check in points to see if I have grown in some way or maybe I’ve been stuck in a rut or maybe I was just at a loss for words and not writing. Now that I circled back to 2018 just to see what I was up to. I was writing about dreaming. Creating a vision. Working your plan. I can safely say I live that model day in day out. Just this week I spent time planning. Preparing for big steps of progress. I use a white board to post ideas and revisit them. It’s an ongoing process. What a great reminder it is for me to spin the dial on my blog posts from time to time.

Where am I going?

Where have I been?

What have I learned?

What am I in the process of learning?

Who’s been along for the ride?

Who’s jumped ship when the waves got rocky?

When will I stop writing about stuff?

When will I publish my next big book?

So many questions.

Life is unfolding and the future is a mystery. This blog is a placeholder. A keepsake for people to read over time. For now I’m living in the moment. I’m choosing the virtual writing platform of this blog as we seem to be in the digital world right now thanks to Corona. 

This isn’t really a fancy post it’s merely a look back for me. A reflection I can openly share as I have published pieces over the years that share a sliver of me. Make no mistake when I say a sliver. My life is full of many twists, turns, and tangled webs. Some who know me well don’t even fully grasp what makes me tick or a ticking time bomb of sorts. For that reason alone you have a sliver. A glimpse. A snapshot of what’s hot or what’s not.

Until next time. Enjoy my twisted sliver of today and yesterday. I guess you will just have to visit this blog often to seen when I spin the time dial again. 

adventure

Damn Near Perfect

I was aiming for a damn near perfect day away. Okay is there such a thing? Probably not but I’m going to make today a priority.

I’m going to see if I focus on the day if I can make it damn near perfect. I’m not sure what I will do yet. But I’ll write about it. I also know if it’s not perfect I’m going try again the next day. I’m on vacation. Why not try to aim for a near perfect day. I have time. I have a break from the chaos. I don’t have any have-tos on my list today.

The funny part about thinking about this is I have nothing to model my perfect day after. It’s what I make of it. It’s what I decide is near perfect. No benchmark for this stats girl. I guess I’ll just throw shit on the wall or the mountains and see what happens. 

I was struggling with altitude adjustments in the Rocky Mountains on this day. Too many quirky “offs” to list them all but I was off in many ways. With such a rough start to how I feel today, could I even aim for perfect? 

I hit the local village coffee shop first thing. I wasn’t expecting much as I had never been nor had I previewed the menu. What I did know is I was starting out local. I got a smile just by the name of my drink. Milky Way was a mix of coffee, chocolate and caramel. A hot treat on a cool and drizzly morning. A little local paper tucked in the corner to read while sipping and enjoying the coffee shop vibe.

I was slowly dusting off my morning crud. The tired eyes. The chilled body. The day’s adventure called for an outdoor activity. Miles away by car. Rain rain go away is all I could say in my mind. We were going to raft the Arkansas River and it was raining. Well I guess it wasn’t going to be perfect but I was going to get wet anyway so I wasn’t going to let the rain sour my outlook for the day.

The ride was amazing. More than I could have expected. From fog to clouds to misty air, the scenery was illuminated. A blink of sunshine. A fierce downpour. A spurt of hail. The mountains are full of mystery. So much beauty right in front of me.

Just before the Continental Divide I spotted a mountain camp or town around a factory. It was spray painted and desolate. I wondered about its history. What once lived there. Why did it shut down? Will it ever be reborn? So much to think about for my curious mind.

A quick pit stop in a quaint town with the oldest saloon I ever did see. The floors creaked. There were many old-time artifacts within. The saloon was bustling with locals and tourists. A cool sight to observe. So much fun to shop in the town stores. From the thrift store to the local homemade good store. The experience was one of a kind. New people. New places. Off the beaten path. My kind of perfect. Leadville, CO was the stop. Home of the Leadville 500 race. Another first experience for me. A race across the sky.

The road was empty yet mystical form of nature. My road to nowhere or somewhere. Just around the bend I would land at my destination. This is where I would meet my guide. His name was Joaquin and he was from Chile. His accent was cool and so was he. Joaquin spends his off seasons working in other countries while his homeland isn’t at peak season. Away from his wife and family. So fun to learn about his adventures. He has worked the rivers in California, Chile, Colorado and Italy to name a few. I felt honored to meet him. I enjoyed my time on the raft drifting and exchanging stories. Oh how we laughed. Oh how we paddled hard. Left forward. Right back. Paddle fast. We even rocked and rolled in the harsh rapids. A few rock jumps. Picnic by the waterside. Views of an abandoned railroad on the river side. So much history. A great experience for all.

My day was unknown at the start. My day could have been altered many times. I had a positive outlook amidst the bad weather and other variables. My attitude reflected my outcome.
The road back was another rainy one but we stopped in the towns along the way to catch a glimpse of local life. I’m pretty sure I was in bed by 8pm. I would say this was a near perfect day for me.

celebrations, fitness and nutrition

Today Was That Day

Today I didn’t want to get up and workout. I looked at the planned workout for the day and it was a Debbie Downer. Just didn’t want to rip off the covers off to rise and grind on this day.


Enter the accountability system. The group check in text at the wee hours of the morning to see who is going to workout today. You see if there are enough of you in the group missing one won’t matter on most days. Unless it’s a summer day and one is on vacation. One is at a work meeting. One is on a scheduled day of rest and so on. If you are the one left you need to pull your shit together and get moving. Big sigh for me. It was my unlucky day.

It was me who was needed this day. I so didn’t want the accountability buddy job. I wanted to hit snooze 10 more times and have a big breakfast when I finally got up. Fate said otherwise. Off I went.

I was pissy on the way to the gym. Then I saw some familiar faces and I forgot I didn’t want to be there. It was pretty simple. Then the workout started and I was like blah, blah, blah. I don’t want to do that I’m not good at it. Boy did I whine a lot.

I did the motions. It wasn’t half as bad as thought. I pushed through and hit a big personal best. I was shocked. After having such a trying time with myself in the morning I had to pinch myself. I did it. I did it again. And again. I laughed but also beamed with pride.

Some days you don’t want to do things but you do them anyway. Life is tough. Many push through tough times. I don’t know what I was really pushing through that morning when I was half asleep but I pushed to my personal best without even flinching. Now the bar is set a bit higher.
Thank goodness for accountability partners. If I wasn’t held accountable I would have just hit snooze.

Teddie Bear Adventures

New Addition

No fancy birth announcement or maybe this is it. June 3, 2021 a puppy was born. Her breeder named her Minnie. The one with the mint green cat collar. The one who needed a home. The one a friend shared online. The one I saw and knew needed to be in my life.

Fast forward through a meet and greet, online question sessions and more.  Plans were set in motion. Supplies purchased. Many discussions about the name debated. A fee was paid. The puppy was mine. As she enters her new life as a pet she will go by the name of Bear. 

We already have Teddie and now we have Bear. Together they will have countless Teddie Bear adventures. Such a cute name combo for the dynamic duo who doesn’t even know each other let alone like each other yet.

So much anticipation. Teddie is spoiled but could benefit from a companion. A bestie. A playmate. Will she understand the logic behind us getting a new addition? Teddie is well trained, happy and a great family pet.

Bear is a puppy. Untrained. Chew monster. Whiner. Tiny little thing weighing just 4 pounds. How will she adjust? Will she like Teddie? Bear is still in the little greenish collar with a bell. Why? She is so tiny she can only fit in a cat collar. It doesn’t even have a spot to connect a leash.  Not that’s she is even remotely close to a walk on a leash.

So many adorable moments to share but I will only list my favorite: watching Teddie walk on a leash and the curious little Bear follows along side or behind just trying to keep up and mirror her gait. One modeling. One learning and growing. Such a beautiful sight to see. When the puppy paws are wet from the grass, they leave the most adorable paw prints on the ground. Sights like this confirm why they needed each other. For Teddie it’s such a growing moment. Instead of pulling and running on the leash she is exercising patience while she waits for the little legs to stay in stride with her. Simply amazing to observe. Those little adorable paw prints.

Sleep or lack thereof. With a puppy comes sleep deprivation. They are just too tiny to make it through the night no matter how tired they are. She does well but again isn’t perfect. Life isn’t perfect. What a subtle reminder we get about life’s imperfections through our puppy. You adjust. You balance. You push through. Ah to see the passed out puppy at bedtime. Out cold under the chair she soon won’t fit under with the big sister keeping guard nearby. Just makes your heart flutter.

What a sight to see. Puppy 1 out for the count. Dog 2 keeping watch. Deflated stuffed animal 3 lying lifeless nearby. A casualty of the busy play day shenanigans however at quick glance it could look like Dog 3. Of course it’s not real. One puppy in training is enough for this household.
I’m sure I will share many more stories and glimpses of life with Teddie and Bear. For now I am off to get a cat nap after rising super early for potty duty. Enjoy the cuteness over load of my four- legged pals.

As I conclude this entry, my heart swells thinking of my puppy’s birth date. June 3rd was also the day of my dad’s birthday. I had no clue until I saw the birth papers that they shared the same birthday. What a great way to honor my dad on his birthday after he passed in 2020. My little buddy has new meaning to me. A guardian angel of sorts.

perspective

If a Tree Falls…

You surely know the only puzzler: If a tree falls in a forest and no one is there to hear it, does it make a sound?

What do you think? These are the kinds of questions that philosophers can sit around and ponder, quander, or some might say squander our time over.

I was thinking recently about the things I do alone. Most are more or less by choice. Many times I’d rather have companions along for the ride. Sometimes it just doesn’t work out that way.

Individualist is strong in my enneagram. I am prone to do things by myself. Sometimes to a fault. Once in a while, though, it gets to me.

Take for example my recent triathlon experience. I was originally scheduled to do this with a few different people. For one reason or another, each of these people were unable to do it that weekend. I had a choice…go it alone or wait until another chance to do an event like this came along.

I was on the fence about it for a while. I really didn’t want to go do it by myself, but I also didn’t want to miss out on my chance to do it. I’m getting to the point with many things in my life where I say, if not now, who knows when the opportunity will come around again?

I ended up doing it and after I completed it I was glad that I did. Still, the experience would have been more fun to share with a friend. To ask if they had seen the turtle on the bike course and felt the same kinship with that slow moving animal. Did you smell the water treatment plant too? Yuck! How was the run for you? How was the swim? Did you do the water slide at the end? I might have been able to take some pics of them.

I do see the value in going it alone, but there is also beauty in shared stories, shared memories, shared moments. Both have value. Neither can be replaced.

After the race I knew I needed coffee. As is my habit, I looked on yelp and found a local coffee shop a couple of blocks away. Completely by surprise, I passed a mural by a well-known artist. I stopped to take a selfie with it, but of course could not fit in the amazing piece at arm’s length. Luckily a nice young man saw me. A military person from the nearby base. He called out and asked if he could take my picture for me. He said it was just so sad to see me trying to get a photo of myself alone. And he was right.

If a tree falls in the forest and no one is there, does it make a sound? If you do something amazing and no one was there to share it with you, does it make a memory?

I’m grateful for the man who saw my struggle and helped capture me with my new set of wings. Hopefully next time some loved ones will also be there to share in it and we can lift each other up.