dare to be different, Teddie Aspen

Crotchless!

This is definitely a post for the record books. It’s no secret I rise in the dark and wee hours of the morning to get my fitness on before most even think of waking.

I normally dress in the dark and move about in a quiet but fast pace to not startle others. On most days that doesn’t work but the effort is there.

I have had my share of friends who put their shorts on backwards or inside out sometimes and they have done it more than once.  We giggle. We move on. I have admittedly put my shorts and bras on inside out but always corrected it because you could feel the difference.

Then today happened. A story like no other. I did my usual morning routine and arrived at the gym. I scurried into the gym in the dark and said hello to a female friend on the way in. Put my keys and phone in the bin and jetted to the girls room. Took care of business and looked down in complete and utter surprise. An oh shit moment of how in the hell did this happen. What am I going to do and send help please but no phone was with me!

I hear the rumble in the next stall of toilet paper being jostled. Who is it? Do I know them? Who cares! I shout who’s there? The reply was who do you think is here? OMG no time for games, it’s Kim. Thank you Jesus an ally. A trusted friend. Don’t come out yet I have a wardrobe malfunction I said. Ummm, okay she replied. What kind of problem? I don’t know let me assess the magnitude. Oh it’s bad. Thank God nobody saw this when I walked in. Or did they?

My dog ate my pants. She specifically and mindfully crafted a crotchless pair of Nike pros! Yes I wrote a crotchless pair of shorts. Not on the seams like a normal rip she actually chewed around in a methodical fashion. See below for proof:

I have no clue how I didn’t notice before I left, on my drive but I am ever so thankful I had to use the restroom before class since today was squat day. Disaster averted or kind of. Now that my class mates think I legit shit myself and had to leave class. If you think I’m joking see below:

Or if the shit yourself comment wasn’t bad enough I got one about Aunt Flo coming for a visit. Sigh, big sigh, deep breath. Now that my morning has been an absolute cluster fuck I should note the following. My little princess of a bitch dog is mad at me. I threw away her favorite frisbee yesterday because she ate it. It was supposed to be indestructible but clearly it wasn’t and neither was my Nike pro shorts that I happened to like a lot. So I will leave you some cute pictures of my dog but confirmation of her devilish side.

Life lessons learned today. Put your fresh laundry away even when your dog wants to lay on your clothes at bed time. Check your drawers before you leave the house and make sure you have panties on so you don’t flash the world your you-know-what accidentally. Take a few extra minutes and wake the house up to avoid utter humiliation.

I will be forever explaining this in the weeks to come. No, I didn’t shit my pants. I had a wardrobe malfunction. My dog ate my shorts. Enough said! Thank you Teddie. I know you can be sweet like the picture below but also evil when you want to be.

dare to be different, fitness and nutrition

Ooops I did it…

Oops I did it again. I bought another pair of shoes. Nike Metcons had me again with their new release!

If you recall I wrote a post about if I were a shoe recently. Seriously if I was a shoe I would have flair. And guess what Nike unveiled a new Metcon shoe with flair.

I didn’t have to design my own. I just had to buy this pair. The shoe literally had me at hello. I’m sure you are chuckling reading this.

But on a serious note the back of the shoe has a ? and an ! in two tone color. That in itself was a selling point for me. Which version of me are you getting today? The crazy excited version or the sleepy space cadet? Those behind me in my CrossFit class could get either on any given day thus I felt the back of shoes clearly stated my position on the daily. They will now get my disclaimer: Either or!

Well then we should just move into the coloring. The bright bold colors. The one side patterned the other not. The color variations of neon to bold. The different shoe lace colors to represent unique qualities. The tongues are even different. So much about these shoes remind me of my diverse life.

Ah, the shoes have flair. I have flair. A marriage of sorts. These shoes are on the way to me. These shoes picked me. I will be wearing them proudly as soon as I get them out of the box.

My shoes make me so happy. They make my feet smile. No blisters. No bad rubbing. Just cushions and colors to help me get the job done. Thank you Nike designers for making my week. For knowing there are people out in this world who need shoes like these.

Thank you life for allowing me the option to buy new shoes. They get used trust me. Just as much as my leggings, tank tops, socks and shorts. I work out more than many and I don’t waste a lot of money on other frills thus my addiction of shoes is justified to me.

Look for workout pics of shoes in the near future. FedEx says my box will be here today. I’m waiting as patiently as I can be at the moment.

Big sigh. A let down sigh. FedEx decided they won’t deliver until tomorrow: I guess the driver wanted to call it a day. So much for paying for priority shipment. 
Delayed gratification. Thanks FedEx.

#shoeaddict#nike #nikemetcon6 #girlswithflair #shoeschoseme

dare to be different

If I Was a Shoe

I just bought the best pair of shoes. They are a hodge-podge mix-match-type shoe which is just perfect for me.

If I were a shoe, I wouldn’t be one dimensional. I would have personality and flair. These shoes sport a little camo for my country girl vibe. A blank canvas to show my creative side. A little cheetah print because it’s badass. Then top it off with some snakeskin for overall style points.

They are definitely functional. They blend with many outfits. They slip on which makes them quick and easy for a busy morning. The Blowfish brand got this design right in my mind. Of course my validation is in my description above, but they are a very comfy shoe as well. The picture below shows them paired with some basic pants for a casual day out. Just slip on and go.

If I were giving rating stars it would be 5 stars for appearance. 5 more for comfort. 3 for price. 5 for versatility. For clarity, I’m referring to a 1-5 scale with 5 being the highest. I don’t get paid to endorse this shoe or brand. I am just a fan of them overall and have been for years. In the past I stuck with the no-lace tennis shoe slip-ons but ventured into some zippered camo high tops when those came out. All good shoes in my mind and why I decide dto write about them.

Take a peek at their new fall line. I saw some cute mashups that even included buffalo plaids. Hope you get a pair to check them out. I’ll be hopping around in mine all fall.

https://blowfishshoes.com/styles/?style=sneakers

After writing this I had a conversation with a friend and she said of course this is a brilliant metaphor. Of course the fastest girl in town needs versatile shoes since she’s always on the move. I laughed at this commentary. Of course there’s no time for blisters with all the pivoting and shifting her life demands so don’t bother rubbing her the wrong way. Again I’m inserting a chuckle because this was a live interaction. And of course they’re eye catching and everyone will be talking about them just like her. Big sigh here. I guess this ties into the eyes on you post.

How my shoes became a conversation starter today. Again it’s all about the shoe. My shoe says flair. Let me tell you about my shoe. If I was a shoe, I’d be a damn good story. If I was just a shoe.

After I wrote this post I sort of ordered a new pair of CrossFit shoes. A flashy pair to add to my collection. See below to see if you can spot the new pair? I may have left a clue or two for you.

dare to be different, featured, fitness and nutrition

Designed By Me, For Me

I’ve had the itch for a while now to get a pair of custom Nike Metcons. Did I really need them? No. But did I really want them? Yes. Do I work hard enough to indulge and buy? Heck yeah!

I waited patiently which is not my style. I am more the immediate gratification type. I let time pass. I watched new releases thinking I’m going to get these. Nope, I didn’t need them. Then I just decided I needed my own flair. I designed my own custom Metcons. Thank you Nike for letting me soar as an individual.

I left these in the cart for a while thinking, should I? And then one day I decided it was time. A gift to me, from me. The design part was simple. The visual confirm said “buy me.” Then the awful wait. Processing, making, finishing, shopping, and the wait. The suspense is just killing me as I wait patiently, getting ever so excited when Nike updates my inbox. 

A little Wonder Woman influence to match some shorts I have. A little individualized style on the tongues. And just an overall badass and obnoxiously loud pair of shoes to get my grind on with. Most of my gym clothes fall into the obnoxious category so might as well add shoes to the list!

So excited to put some mileage on these new kicks. Let me know if you give them a thumbs up or down.

It’s good to get some retail therapy here and there. If you have been holding off on that special gift for you from you, go for it. Let my post be the one to push you over the edge. Indulge indeed.

And for the record, that pair of Metcons that I had waited on ordering went on sale. Yep, they sure did. I bought those, too. Shaking my head at myself. #shoesgirl two pairs on the way. One custom, one basic off the shelf. They will still work the same.

Don’t judge me. I’m living my best life. Getting fit along the way. Smiling as I strut my stuff in my new comfy kicks.

And two thumbs up for the lifting inserts inside the new Metcons, the tissue paper and my name label. Nike did not disappoint. Bonus points to Nike for that extra boost.