challenges

Pretend It’s Normal

It’s not quite the end of 2020 and there are about ten thousand phrases I’d like to forget with the new year.

Here are just a few, besides the obvious social distancing:

Abundance of caution – “Out of an abundance of caution, we’ve postponed another event you’ve already planned for / paid for / trained for / committed to indefinitely.”

A little different – “Thanksgiving / the holidays / Disney World / The Peachtree Road Race will look a little different this year, but…”

A year like no other…the list goes on. I want it to stop.

But the one that is like a dagger to my lungs is just the word “normal” in almost any context. Yes, “new normal” is annoying because it implies that this is going to drag on and on forever. But just the word normal is even worse. Especially in my work environment.

“We want it to be like a normal school experience.”

Say what you will about science and politics. What we are going through is not normal. I’m hopeful it’s a once-in-my-lifetime occurrence. Walking around in masks, keeping 6 feet apart, sanitizing a million times a day, kids unable to move as they please or need to, feeling suspicious every time someone sneezes…none of this is normal. Dear bosses…Evaluating how or what I am doing based on “normal” standards is also silly. Thankfully, our state lawmakers came to their senses and made the high-stakes tests high school students take at year end irrelevant to their grades. Take it all as just data, not as a way to penalize kids for situations they didn’t create or choose.

People are doing the best they can. And now more than ever that can be a messy, unpredictable, incomprehensible jumble. Forgive it all. Accept it. This goes for my attitude toward myself, too. Keep going. Lift others up when you can. That’s all I can do.

So when you say you want it to be more normal…I want work (and grocery shopping and traveling and everything else for that matter) to be more like a “normal” experience, too. I wish none of this were happening or that I could wave my magic wand and have it be over. Voila! Normal!

Not that easy. Hopefully we are on the way to a better normal in the near future. But for now, can we please just treat this like the anything-but-normal experience it is?

What pandemic words and phrases make you ragey these days?

giving

Cheering People On Who Need It

You never know who it might be.

Maybe it’s the co-worker everyone finds annoying because they seem to be so hypersensitive about the pandemic and germs and social distancing and sanitizer.

Maybe it’s the colleague who shows up on time every day to his job, doesn’t necessarily go above and beyond but quietly and dutifully does what is required.

Maybe it’s the person who is constantly cheering everyone else on. Posting photos with wide smiles. Positive quotes.

I know each of these people. And I know they are each suffering in their own ways. Do you know these people? When you look around, really look, do you see them?

Yes, I have that co-worker who keeps his door closed. Who was afraid to come back to work and still has those fears but needs the income and benefits. Who people roll their eyes about in conversation because he wants his room cleaned multiple times per day.

So what did I do? I wrote him a thank you note. I complimented his work to my boss. I went out of my way to appreciate him. He is not having an easy time.

The person who is always positive? Once in a while she gives a glimpse into her struggles. She drops a hint. But then she keeps on encouraging. I see a bit of myself in her. Or the person I hope to be. I try to tell her often how much she is a light in my life. It reminds me of someone like Robin Williams, among others, who seemed so funny and light and full of life. Sometime there is struggle there. Who might be putting on a brave face?

It’s the “in the middle” or “under the radar” people I have been trying to look out for lately. Those who are just going through the motions. Nothing unusual. No big highs or red flags. Maybe they’re just kind of invisible.

How are they holding up? Are they barely holding it together? I worry about forgetting people. I worry about people feeling alone and forgotten. When I text to check in on someone and it’s been a month since I’ve heard, I know I need to do better.

I have the fatigue that many others do. The whole thing is wearing on me. My gratitude muscles are sort of flabby. They aren’t as strong as they used to be. I need to keep reaching, stretching, and extending them.

Look around you. Do you see any of these people? How can you give them a lift, show appreciation, let them know they are seen?

The holidays will continue. Think of some unique ways you can lift people up in these draggy times.

coaching

Coaching Me

When I coach others I inadvertently coach myself. I reflect on time points. I reflect on opportunities that have come and gone. I take a look at organizing and prioritizing. I reflect on my physical and emotional wellness and so much more.

As a professional coach I help others. It’s one of the best feelings in the world to see others succeed with a little encouragement or nudging. One side bonus for me is the self-reflection and personal strides I make in each engagement as I look at myself through the coaching process.

Today was a day of coaching. Helping somebody over a hurdle. Minimizing fear while capitalizing on self worth. Sounds easy but it’s not.

I love when others shine. I’m not such a fan of negativity or low self-worth. I think everyone should see their inner and outer beauty but many don’t.

When I can help one person understand themselves and how to grow with their own grit it makes me smile for days, weeks and sometimes longer depending on the case or hurdles conquered.

As we are in November I am celebrating all month being thankful. Today I am thankful for the ability to coach, inspire and mentor others. It’s one of the most rewarding pieces of my life.

giving, health

Feeling Good

I’m feeling good today. The best I’ve been in a while. I’m firing on all cylinders and nobody is generally up my ass. Not sure how long this peaceful state will last but I’ll take it for even five to ten minutes.

Since I was feeling good today I thought I would write a post about being thankful since Thanksgiving is approaching. 

First and foremost I am thankful for my health. My general ability to rise each day and move freely without mobility restrictions.

I am then thankful for my family and friends. Without them I wouldn’t have the support I need to carry the heavy load I do each week. Each person is placed in my life for a reason not a season.

I am thankful for opportunities. The opportunity to serve others. The opportunity to inspire and motivate those around me.

The list goes on and on. Take some time to yourself and reflect on what and who you are thankful for this holiday. Drop a note, make a call, drop by for a visit and let your circle know how valued they are. This is free but many won’t do it.

Be thankful this year for something or someone. If you’re not thankful make a donation. Somebody will benefit and be thankful for you!

working women

Patience

Can one master patience?

Generally speaking I am an immediate gratification girl but I am always working to master my patience skills.

This requires conditioning the patience muscles. Right now I’m in a conditioning phase. Many loose pieces in multiple big projects means I have to wait patiently for some to collaborate or make decisions.

This patience phase can be a grueling process for me as I like the finish line in projects. I like cross over the line and say I did it. Boom! Sometimes however it’s not about the finish line rather it’s about the process.

The cultivation. The experience. The relationships. The people. The success. The failure. The memories. The time. The overall patience built into the crossing of the finish line. Watching the vision turn into reality.

Let’s talk about writing a book. Our 1095 Days project. It’s in the works. Well into the planning and execution phase but no finish line. The process has been nothing less than amazing. Much of our concept couldn’t be imagined on the onset to the naked eye. Only the eye that was interested in investing in the farming time. The planting of the seeds. The patience required while you wait for the seed to blossom. The time. That’s the beauty of the process.

In my yard during corona I planted some trees. Now months later those trees are starting to flower. Such a beautiful sight. One blossom born out of such a devastating time. New growth is around in the land but also in people. If we all Look deep into our souls we all learned something during corona. We grew.

In business there is always what’s next. The next sales month. The next big deal. The next job experience. This means if you think there is a finish line then you halted your growth. You have to look beyond the finish line to see what’s next. Or for some like me it’s what is here in the now. I see the finish line but I’m working on what’s in the middle. Because I’m working on what’s in the middle my finish line may be extended. Maybe a longer project yielding more value or maybe even a deeper relationship with a client because of the time spent in the middle.

My patience growth is in the middle. Where is your growth? As I grow I mentor others. This blog is just a glimpse of what I do for many although each experience is different which enables me to compound my growth through experiences.

I encourage each of you reading this to challenge yourself in some aspect of life. Maybe it’s getting organized financially. Maybe it’s taking a risk on a dream. Maybe it’s even swimming across a stretch of water because you fear you can’t.

Take the next move before it’s too late. You can exercise your patience muscles after you take the first step!

Vulnerability, courage and patience all tie together in my mind for many reasons. In order to grow exponentially you usually need to be aware of these three words. More to come on that is a future post.