Tag: freedom

perspective

Good Bye 2023

2chicksandapen

What a year. So many cool things came up on my radar. Many fun adventures. A few trials. A few set backs. Many lessons learned. All in all it was a good year.

I learned to play pickleball in 2023. A new sport for me. A new social group. I very much enjoyed picking up this new hobby. I even enjoyed getting beat by old people my first season in a league. Maybe a little humbling too.

For 2024 I’m spending time with the 1sE app a friend recommended. Basically documenting a second a day for the year. A picture or video or combo. Can’t wait to see what makes the reel. Seems like a fun way to rewind 2024 a year from now. 

I got a chance to travel a good bit in 2023. Spent time on the road with different travel mates adding to the adventures.  Travel by plane. Travel by car. Travel by RV. The variety kept things spicy. Some planned in advance. Some spur of the moment. Each memorable. The travel bug that hit in 2023 will continue in 2024. I’m feeling the need to explore on my horizon. New places. New experiences. Checking out the hidden gems along the way to each destination. Being present in my life journey while I’m able to enjoy it.

Fitness has been in the forefront in 2023 and will continue in 2024, adding a running goal for my special focus and long term goal. In 2023 I chipped away at 1 million meters by row, bike or ski erg and now I need a new focus. I was recently asked about the why of my long term goal. Since I have a short attention span it’s important for me to have a long term goal to chip away at. I might have to break it up into bite-sized pieces or add variety to get it done, but it helps me overall to have that focus in the background. Somehow I’m able to mirror my life and fitness balance in similar ways. Chipping away seems to work for me.

Friendship has been valued in 2023. Through the high and lows of life it’s good to have a solid group of trusted friends to help you sort through the chaos. Friends are by choice. Some stay awhile and others fade. I’ve seen friends fall ill, needing support while I remain healthy. I hope to continue to fuel myself so that I may continue to be a good friend to others in times of need. i don’t expect much in return but it’s nice to know I do have good friends in my corner. I plan to spend 2024 nurturing relationships that are meaningful.

Reflecting on the year was bitter sweet for me. I focused on thankfulness and let others know how valued they were. I wrote sweet notes. I gave away funny keepsakes. I made a point to impact others as the year closed out. It felt good all around. I even played Cupid in 2023 and the couple is still going strong. Such a fun and unexpected part of 2023.

Feeling free as I roll into 2024. Free of baggage weighing me down. Free to explore and enjoy life and its beauty. One day at a time. I guess I may choose to write a little along the way too. Just a glimpse of my reflection from me to you.  Wishing you all the best in 2024 and beyond. 

balance

Road Bike Ramblings

2chicksandapen

Checked the tires. Helmet on. Out before dawn.

A pre-sunrise neighborhood bike ride was on the docket. Thirty minutes. Easy peasy. Just cruising to get the blood flowing early on a Sunday.

I live at the top of a hill. So the very first thing I get to do is fly. Fly down the hill, wind in my face, breathing deep. Yes, all you Safety Susies, I left my Airpods at home so I could pay closer attention to any traffic at the early hour. As a side benefit I also enjoyed the sounds of the crickets. The frogs. The quiet of morning. A line from a poem came to mind…”to be the only one awake in a house wrapped in sleep.” There is a special peace in that (and maybe a few giggles thinking how many safety cameras I was tripping off.)

Once the wind hit my face on that downhill I remembered how much I love my road bike. Just getting going on it makes me smile but flying down a hill is such a special feeling of freedom. So it makes no sense that I don’t ride more often. I only get out once a month or so. I keep saying I am going to do a triathlon this year. But I realized I am in a mode where the distance between what I say I want to do and what I actually do is great. I want to slim down to feel better but I don’t adjust my nutrition to achieve that. I want to write more but don’t take the time. I want to express gratitude to people who have helped me but the thank you cards still sit in their wrapper. Something I thought about as I rolled under the streetlamps.

Back to biking…I have been doing an endurance program at the gym once a week on a stationary bike. It’s been good for my pacing and endurance control. I tell myself it’s triathlon training. But it doesn’t replace time on an actual road on a bike.

When it comes to the road bike, I hate the uphills. I fumble with the gears trying to make my legs hurt less. My neighborhood is basically all hills of various lengths and gradients. (This is one reason why I sometimes don’t get on my road bike. It takes time and effort to transport it to a flat course.) But as I was riding this morning, I embraced the hills. I took my time getting up them. I sat with the pain instead of resisting it. And then, I enjoyed the coast down the other side. The reward for the work. The time to breathe.

I thought about many friends who I know are facing that big hill in their lives. With a job. With a family member. With a relationship. With themselves. They don’t want to climb it. They would rather go around or just stay put. (This is me, too! In more areas than I’ve even shared.) The only way to get that feeling of freedom is to do the work of getting up the hill. Some times of life are just smooth effort, puttering along on the flats, enjoying the scenery. But exhilaration, the relief, the satisfaction of wind at my face comes after I’ve pushed myself through a challenge. Time to summit the hills I’ve just been staring down, hoping they will disappear. I have been given these mountains to show they can be moved, as they say. Or, so that I can enjoy the beauty and freedom of the other side.

challenges

Jail Time Revisited

2chicksandapen

Recently I had the opportunity to experience a county jail with an added twist. I’ve written about visiting the jail before as a contractor recounting an inside view. I visited the exterior as part of a jail run a few years back that included running the officer obstacle training course (so much fun) and the campus which bordered the barbed wire fences and guard towers. Both experiences were memorable and offered different views of the same place.

Over the past week I had yet another view. An unexpected view. I needed to try to visit an inmate. What started out as a simple endeavor ended up extremely complex. So many things I didn’t know, didn’t expect or just couldn’t wrap my arms around.
the first big blow is no in-person visitors which is the exact opposite of the county website which states visitation Mon-Fri and Sat/Sun for under 18. I guess they are still under Covid protocols even though most other places are not. This was funny in itself as you don’t need a mask to enter the jail but you can’t visit. The next option is a fee- based video visit, but figuring this option out almost requires an IT degree and a lot of patience.

That’s right. Get the app. Download the app. Set up a user ID. Add funds. Upload identification documents to prove who you are. Now wait. Wait until somebody in an office somewhere approves you. This took three days in my case. Once you have access, you can schedule a call. I almost forgot you need to deposit more money for the call and pay more service fees. Just when you think you are at the finish line you have to be patient again. It seems the schedule is not the same day. That means you wait longer and the person inside has no idea how hard you are trying to make contact. Big sigh.

What’s the other option? Send a letter. I was told happy mail is very uplifting. Okay, what’s the address. Well the address you mail to is far away. It has to be sorted to make sure there is no contraband. Well over the holiday, mail delays, etc. would lead me to believe this would be another dead end.

How about a phone call. Can the person make a call? Only if they have money they tell me. How do they get money? Glad you asked. There is a jail ATM. Never seen one of those before. You have to upload your picture, your social security number, address and so much more. Then you can pay money and exorbitant fees. Again, it’s not instant. It takes a day to process and the funds need to be deposited by 8am. That means if you put money in the ATM on Sunday at 4pm the inmate won’t see it until Tuesday after 8am. Delays galore.

Four days it takes to get any form of contact. This provides so much insight into what folks deal with when they are immersed in the jail system. I can’t even imagine if my parent was in jail, how a young adult could handle all the chaos associated with saying hi to somebody who probably needs some extra support during their incarceration.
This experience has taught me I for sure don’t ever want to spend time in jail. I also don’t want to have to visit anyone I know in jail. I like my freedom too much. I like to choose what I do and when I do it. I thought visiting somebody in an assisted living facility was hard in the heart of the pandemic, however I would definitely say visiting a jail is 1000x harder current day. 

With mental health issues challenging society today, it is bothersome to me that inmates lose not only their freedom but their ability to get compassionate care. I define compassion to include communication with willing visitors vs starving them of hope and friendly faces.

In summary, I’d always tell somebody think carefully about actions or inactions that can land one in jail. It’s not a place i’d recommend at all.