Tag: southern

adventure

Buckshot and Gil

2chicksandapen

Two rednecks.

One bus.

Comedic relief.

This is what you get in Nashville, Tennessee when you book the Redneck Comedy Bus Tour. It was definitely a memorable event. Everything from camel toes to child rearing jokes and anything in between all with redneck flair.

Buckshot was the lead comedian but the driver Gil had some great punch lines. His silver flowing hair from the seventies added to the show as did the beer belly and Pabst shirt on Buckshot.

I will never think of going to the bathroom in a woods again after this show. Something about a mud missile shooting out one’s rear and bear trap clenching the front side. Riding around and around and around the roundabout with the naked statues while the Redneck bus load chanted “boobies and dicks” will also forever be burned in my mind. I know this is art, but thinking about how many pass this with kids in the car crack me up since all I hear is boobies and dicks!

So many laughs indeed. Just what the doctor ordered. Laughter. I wanted to see the smiles. I wanted to hear the laughter. I wanted the fun time. The unexpected laughs. I got just what I wanted. A few bonuses at the end included the redneck sign challenge and a free flight at Old Smokey Moonshine. More unexpected fun and laughter.

If ever in Nashville check out the tour bus. Read the reviews. You won’t be disappointed. Ask for Buckshot and Gil.

adventure, friendship

Breakfast Time

2chicksandapen

It was time for breakfast on a sunny Sunday morning. Visiting a new town and not an egg in the house. Time to eat out.

Off we go online for reviews. We find a local place in town. Palmer’s Cafe on St. Simons Island. It was a cozy place in town. There was a line outside which was a good sign.

Then there was the menu:

Well this is just one page to highlight and really the reason for this post. I wanted an omelette but I was just unsure what to order. They sparked my curiosity but sounded weird too.

I went with the chicken pot pie. Partly because of the name but also because I just had to see what it was like. Let me me just say it was delicious from the first bite to the last. I made a happy plate for sure.

My omelette was not the only tasty one. Everyone at the table opted for a different one which enabled us to share. The Local, the Hooch, even the special of the day with brisket was amazing. This is a must visit place if you ever are on St. Simons Island.

I can’t even stop at the omelettes. They have delicious pancakes as well. One was even named Buddy and it was a banana pudding pancake that had banana goop oozing out the sides. I’m not a fan of oozy banana flavors but everyone else at the table was nibbling and savoring the flavor.

All the while I was polishing off some grits. Not just any grits. They were pimento cheese grits that were extremely tasty. Another staple to try if you make it to St. Simons Island.
Enjoy my tidbit for your tastebuds. Hope you don’t get too hungry reading this.

author moments

Redneck Sweetheart

2chicksandapen

This is a funny little story with an even more interesting name: redneck sweetheart.

Let’s get started by laying the ground work. A new acquaintance asked if I’m from around this area? Should I take offense? Should I be flattered? So much to think about.

It got me thinking about the south. I’m originally from the north but spent more than half my life in the south. If majority rules I’m technically more southern based on time vested. Who would guess? I talk fast to most. I’m blunt and I don’t pussy foot around most topics like a nice southern lady. To put it lightly, I can talk about poop.

Keeping with this thought I have heard a million times over all the redneck jokes. All the dumb southern jokes. The list goes on and on. So today I thought I’d write about being a redneck sweetheart. I’d classify more as a redneck than a fine southern lady. 

My first redneck self portrait will be of my yard. What would this sweetheart’s yard look like if you were a neighbor of mine:

I think I have a big yard. Maybe even a pasture or two. I’d find some junk at the local swap meet or antique store to decorate my yard. I would of course call it yard art.

As part of my yard art, I’d go on Facebook marketplace to find me an old school outhouse. I’ve always fancied those cool pieces of history so I’d have to have one in my yard. I may even have a commode in it. Non-working of course. Wouldn’t want to seep the sewage into my yard.

I like bacon so maybe I’d have a pet pig. If I did I’d name him Hank. Hopefully the stink wouldn’t be too bad for my neighbors who have a nice view of my yard.  I use a lot of eggs since I eat healthy so you would definitely have some chickens running around. Maybe even a cock to add to the noise or ambiance. They might be a little noisy and stinky but I’m sure there are worse things to have in your yard.

I like old cars a lot and I’ve seen many people collect old trucks and use the beds for flowers or just yard junk. I guess you’d see a car or two in my yard. If I’m collecting cars I might put out an old tractor because they look cool too.

Whenever my friends get together for a day at the house we usually light fireworks or shoot guns. Things with lots of bangs, booms, pops and stuff. Might make the neighbor’s dog jump, but I can do what I want in my yard.

What redneck sweetheart doesn’t like to ride a dirt bike or four wheeler up down and around the yard? Well that’s me. So I guess if we were neighbors you would see me out and about living my best redneck life on my cool toys. I’m revving the engine in my mind now. The sounds just get me pumped up. The louder the better.

I have a little hill in part of my yard too. When it snows you will see me sledding but when it’s super hot you will me rigging up my own slip n’ slide. Redneck style of course. That means large sheets of plastic with dish soap loaded and ready to go. Lots of screams, laughs and maybe some curse words would be heard if you were my neighbor. If you were my neighbor you’d probably want to hang out but I only invite friends over so you might just have to be a spectator. Sucks for you.

I love entertaining especially in my big yard. Frying turkeys outside on Thanksgiving. Fireworks for the Fourth of July, Memorial Day, and any other time I feel like it. Seafood boil a couple times a year for my crazy Cajun friends. Big family parties in yard. There could be jumpy things, kegs of beer, games and so much chaos at any time. Celebrating life is always a hoot.

As a redneck sweetheart, I have lots of stories to share. One perspective of life. Not good or bad, just one perspective. Now the question is would you judge me if you were my neighbor? Would you give this redneck sweetheart a chance or would you put up a wall? A do not disturb sign?

I really thought about it. If I didn’t like my neighbor would I put up a wall? Maybe. I guess if somebody bothered me enough I’d go through great lengths to make them miserable but just because I could doesn’t mean I should. That’s where this this redneck sweetheart comes into play. I play nice inside my fence. Well for the most part.

I had so much fun writing this redneck post that I think I will continue my redneck stories as a series. Watch for more silly stories to come. I may even ask cousin sally to write as she is a fine southern lady. Guess you’ll have to wait to see.