My friends and CrossFit community mean a lot to me. My coaches are an important part of my progress. There are so many people who are important on my health journey.
But in the end, when I go to workout, I show up for me. All the different versions.
I show up for the grouchy one. The tired one. The clumsy one. The one who doesn’t think she can do it. I show up for the feisty one, the nervous one, the one who is just going through the motions.
I show up for the one who loves burpees and power cleans. I show up for the one who forces herself to do thrusters and running. I show up for the one who mumbles and grumbles and at times dawdles and always has to run to the restroom just before the countdown to zero.
I show up for the one who sometimes forgets how far she has come. I show up for the one who thinks she will lose her momentum if she misses a single day. Who forgets that an off day won’t set her back 5 years.
I show up to meet her. Who will she be today? I show up to see what’s new and how she has changed. Some days she surprises me. I show up to encourage her, to lift her through it.
Keeping the promises I make to myself is as important as any other commitment I make in my life. A recent podcast featuring Ed Mylett reminded me how important it is to move, to detach from outcomes and focus on the process, and to follow through on the promises I make to myself.
There are a few precious people I would put myself on the back burner for. This is a huge change from how I used to be. I used to be willing to back burner myself at a moment’s notice for anyone who even asked. People I hardly knew. Heck, some of them didn’t even ask – I volunteered! It was almost a point of pride to be that way.
But the extreme selflessness I prized in myself cheated me of my strength, my energy, and my growth. I am learning that I am better if I rank myself high on my priority list. And that means showing up for myself. Even when it is hard. Even when I am going it alone. Even when no one high fives me. The people who I would set it all aside for notice. And they celebrate how I am changing. For the better.
I can’t drink from an empty cup. When I am there for myself, my cup runneth over, and I have more of me to go around.