Tag: writing

adventure

NYC Mid Day Tour

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Ping pong in the park. One of my travel mates says: when was the last time you went to the park at home to just chill out or meet a friend? I heard nothing. It’s not an everyday activity for us. Is that because we drive more outside the city?

That brought up the thought of walking. Is there less obesity for those who live in the city because they walk everywhere? It got me thinking about how sedentary my day really is in comparison to others. I walk to my car in the garage vs. walking to the bus stop down the street or the subway. I park at the grocery store and do minimal walking vs. toting my groceries ten city blocks in a cart. How many suburban adults make it a point to walk each day? I checked my Apple Watch and I have a lot of room to improve on my personal step count.

Lunch was next on the bucket list. The famous Katz’s Deli. And let me tell you this place did not disappoint. From the moment you walk in the door the aroma is amazing. The vibe is super cool. The people are from all sorts of backgrounds. The sandwich masters are friendly yet very New York in persona. Despite the harsh exterior or tough guy voices, they were very customer-driven. Offering samples of meat to make sure you got what you wanted. I was on the fence between a pastrami sandwich and corned beef sandwich. Then I saw the sliced turkey and was completely torn. Then I tasted the pastrami and I was sold. Just one bite was all it took.

The carving of the meat was fun to watch. The bins of meat were full yet they cleared out fast. Not sure how much meat this place serves in a day, but that’s probably the largest amount of meat I’ve seen consumed in record time.

The end result was a sinfully delicious sandwich. I devoured my meat and left the bread to the side. Not that the bread wasn’t good, rather the meat was far more worth the calories. Turkey sandwich in the background for comparison. Some opted for melted cheese and the variety of pickles they served on the side was a sweet treat as well.

As we departed we had two interesting encounters. One, a family from Ireland who patiently waited for our table. An interesting conversation exchange over lunch in passing. Upon exit we were greeted by a young women under what appeared to be the influence of heavy drugs. The door attendant made sure she didn’t enter thus we had a little street entertainment. This young lady had her hair (weave) in her hand while she was visibility disheveled, shouting a lot of nonsense and not stringing her words together very well. An interesting and sad sight all at the same time. These two experiences were very different yet minutes apart. I chalk this up to big city life. 

A ride on the subway was next. It was the best method of transportation to the next destination but it did take over an hour and we had a few swaps of trains. The stations are dirty and underground. The rats and other creepy things lurk about. The trains are full of people. Lots of different people. What an experience. I could say so much about the sights, sounds and smells on the big city train but I will really just say it’s an experience everyone should have.

Again I reminisce about my limited commute to my garage each day to get in a car and go a short distance. While some of the folks on the train have to ride for hours, walk, stand, etc. just to get to their job. Thinking about it makes me tired, but that’s their life. I see less obesity on the train than in the suburbs. Is there a correlation to movement? Then we see the headlines on the price of gas: I guess it’s much easier to use the mass transport route during these harder times of dealing with rising gas prices!

My day in the city was full of so much. I can’t write it all down despite doing a series post. I hope many readers get to experience New York City their way one day.

perspective, working women

A Womanly Week

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It’s been a week for the record books in more ways than one. I wasn’t sure I’d write about the week but then decided it could be valuable to another thus I opted to share away. And keep in mind this is a snapshot in time of a woman in her 50’s. Not her 20’s.

There were fluctuations in body temperatures. It seemed I’d been hot in the middle of the night. Not able to sleep peacefully. Maybe even sweaty at times. Cold during the day. Bundling up as if it was much colder outside than it actually was. Did anyone else suffer these same symptoms in my home? Nope. Did I look crazy? A bit. Was I sick? No. Well there you have it, my irregular cycle appeared. That in itself explains so much yet so little. This is part of my stage of life that is summed up as absolute fuckery.

The angry phase hit more than once this week. The shortness of patience was ever so present. The general irritability was constant. The need for space from people was daily. All of it. Mid life crisis at its best. Emotional roller coaster. High and lows. So much blah. There was push back from some around me. There was silence from others. Neither I’m fond of, but neither is experiencing my loads. Therefore those who don’t walk in my shoes cannot judge me.

Then there are the outlets. I ran some this week. I don’t care so much for running yet running seemed to free my mind from all the excess baggage it had this week. This is mental baggage. Not even the physical baggage associated with bloated in the stomach area or just inflammation in general from the craziness of an irregular cycle. Writing such as this is therapy as well. Settling my thoughts to find some method of the chaos. Whether I publish or not, I write.

Then I read an article about working women. All that a woman is expected to do and bear the title of mom on top of it. Big sigh. Yet nobody refers to a dad as a working dad. Such an irony. Thinking about this on top of everything else at times put me over the edge. Women get the short end of the stick. Balancing work / life / parenting while maintaining a household. Doctor appointments, medicine pick ups, school conferences, and and and.  Many dads go off to work and just focus on a singular task for the day. Women have fireworks going off by the minute in contrast.

Running helped me this week. Going to the gym was a godsend. I might have performed the best I had in a while. Not sure the main reason for that but it was the outlet that was needed for me. Lift heavy shit. Run alone. Life is heavy in this season of life. Many can’t relate to one’s highs and lows thus lifting heavy shit helps me cope. Running on the other hand let’s me breathe the air. Recycle the airflow from within.

All of the above enabling me to deal with the stupidity of others. Giving me patience to watch others make mistakes. Showing grace when I literally want to dope slap somebody. And then there is the big one. Swallowing my pride when others crumble. I want to help many. It can be most difficult to watch one crumble or fold in front of you. It’s hard but sometimes it’s a needed step for others to grow despite it killing you a bit inside.

All while the above was circulating my week, there were also nightmares. Very distressing nightmares specific to immediate family members. Had one come to fruition I would be a basket case. Thankfully that wasn’t the case. However, it was a rude awakening of what could be. Why did I have these flashes and not the ones most directly impacted?

Whatever the reason, I had to feel all of that amidst my sleep which was already erratic. My days became longer. My wakes became harder. My time became less productive. My mind raced all the time. My week was summed up as unsettling.

The good news is I’m still here. I’m refocused to a certain extent. I’m ready for a scenery break to fully reset my mind and body. Don’t ever underestimate the change in surroundings. It’s often said you become what you surround yourself with. Success breeds success. In order to grow or shift out of a funk of any kind you need to pivot. Step away from the ordinary to experience variety.

Make sure you have a slush fund of sorts for your mid life crisis moments. Maybe it’s a new pair of shoes you splurge on. Maybe it’s a weekend away. Maybe it’s a trip of a lifetime. Maybe it’s just a cute pair of earrings you always wanted. Heck you may even want a sexy photo shoot.

Just do it. It’s self care. Therapy. The headaches, heartaches and shit will still be where you left it when you come back. I promise. The shit pile doesn’t go away. The break just helps you look at the shit a little differently. Life is all about perspective.

My perspective sucked most of this week. A little fresh air. Some pampering. Time away from annoying people. Socializing and exercising with people who share my fit lifestyle all helped in my reset. I slept a little sounder last night. I appreciate my life a little more today.

I am that girl working through this mid life crisis mess. Some days are easy. Some are not. Some weeks seem fun. Others seem ever so long. I’m not alone. Many struggle. Many women struggle. I’m writing today to say it’s okay. Whatever stage or phase you are in, you will push through it. It may be bumpy at time but that’s life.

Women are designed to endure.

Women are extremely strong.

Women make the world go round.

I’m convinced.

challenges, family

A Letter to My Daughter

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She is strong.

She is smart.

She is persistent.

She is determined.

She is generally reserved with her feelings, but on this day, she called filled with frustration. Her new schedule brought unexpected challenges. Things that were once easy were impossibly hard. Huge classes, hard to get around. Too much to take care of, not enough time and energy. All this after the patience and persistence and hard work finally got her to the place she had wanted to be for so long. It had been different at her previous school the year before. She hadn’t expected to be happy there. But now, finally settling in at the school of her dreams, instead of happily ever after, she was met with one annoying plot twist after another.

What’s a mom to do? When you can’t be there? When you can’t just make her dinner or sit with her on the couch? Mostly, I just listened. I let her share how hard things were right now. With classes, with meeting people, with time management. With little things like eating well and parking and taking care of her dog. I gave any advice I could. Mainly, just keep going. Get up and try your best every day. It will get better.

She was calmer when we hung up. But I was shaken. I was sad. I couldn’t sleep well as I was thinking about her.

When I stopped pretending to sleep in the morning, after my workout and getting to work early, I sat outside and wrote her a letter. Page after page poured out. More mom advice and reminding her who she is. That girl I wrote about at the top of this piece. And how she is never alone.

Think of your future self, I told her. What will make your future self proud? In 5 years, will you be happy you kept going and gave it your best or that you gave up when it was hard?

I think about my future self all the time. When I don’t feel like meal prepping for the week, I know my future self will appreciate healthy food so I push through my laziness. Same with setting out my clothes for the next day, going to the gym, and a million other little decisions I make. I do it to make my future self happy, proud, or even just to make her life a little easier. A little planning, a little forethought, and life just goes better.

In a couple of days, things seemed to be a little better. We all have those rough patches. Maybe it’s a day, a week, or even longer. Pick up the phone and share it. Let people listen and help give you a little perspective and wisdom. The people who love you don’t want you to suffer, and definitely not suffer alone. Finally, things have a way of getting better with time. Believe it.

adventure

NYC and the US Open

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The US Open 2023 in New York City. What an amazing experience it was. From the moment I entered the event to the moment I left I was in awe. As a friend said to me, the Open will just not be the same moving forward on TV after being here in person. True statement.

Let’s start with this photo. Equal prize money. Enough said. Coco earned it! But as I reflect on my day at the Open, I can’t not talk about wheelchair tennis. Amazing to watch in person. The strength and focus required to serve. The tenacity and grit to roll and hit a ball on one side of the court and immediately shuffle to the opposite side for the next. It’s fantastic to see up close. The facial expressions. The sounds. The celebrations but also the defeats. I was was watching juniors on this day making it more powerful given the age and maturity of these athletes. Made me want to do better in all things I do daily without those limitations.

Of course I needed to share the street art as well. Capturing NYC, its culture and the sport of tennis all in one. Now back to the details of the event. Thank you American Express for your hospitality area and all the cool things to do as part of the fan experience.

A little digital glow tennis. A shoe cleaning station. Some freebie sunscreen. Free customization on your keepsake items. Free charging station which was a midday must for me. An air conditioned hang out space to refresh and recharge. A terrace view of some tennis for lay people to try new racquets. Maybe even some time to sip on one of the fabulous Open cocktails. The Honey Deuce was a fan favorite by far. The commemorative glass with the historical title wins was an added bonus. The iced version was an amazing cool down in the moment as well. They even had fancy straws to take home with cleaning brushes in a nice straw sack. Again thank you American Express. You did sponsor the event well.

I couldn’t not write about the cryo facial that American Express offered its cardholders. A special perk that was well worth it. A first for me but it definitely won’t be a last. If you haven’t tried a cryo facial, you should! And one last big win for American Express: free use of radios. Show your card and pick up a little radio for your ear attached to a lanyard for easy on/off use. A great way to hear up-to-the-minute commentator words amongst the roars of the crowd. One ear on the radio. One ear on the live crowd.

The matches in the Arthur Ashe Stadium were action packed. Of course I was cheering for Coco who ultimately took home the title but being there I cheered for all the amazing efforts and winning points on both sides. We even sat through a one hour delay during the Gauff match thanks to fossil fuel protestors. One of which glued their feet to the ground. I can’t even make that story line up. The ambiance within the stadium was awesome. The open ceiling. The neon lights. The game clock. The stats board. The serve speeds. The people. The fans. The reactions. All of it! An A-plus experience.

I hope I have the chance to be a super tennis fan again in the future. Whether it’s the is Open or another big event I will be first to say yes to the experience. I traveled with a new group this time around. I had a blast. We were bonded by love for tennis and our adventurous spirits. Find your people. Expand your horizons. Try something new. Go. Go. Go. Don’t let fear hold you back from enjoyment.

That’s my Open story. Women’s semi-finals. September 7, 2023. I was part of Coco Gauff’s history making. Feeling lucky to have been there. Proud of all the tennis Coco played to make it to the top!

awareness, hustle

The List of Three

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One day she was asked to make a list of three. Unplanned assignment. Thought required. Time was limited for the response. The gut answered.

The list boiled down to three simple words. 

Commitment.

Consistency.

Prioritizing.

Each can be applied to life and self daily. Committing to self. Committing to goals. Consistently working on self. Consistently working towards goals. Prioritizing what is important to self. Prioritizing life to mesh with all of the above.

At times these three words can work for you. At times these words can work against you, if you let them. Perspective is important in life. Everyone has their own perspective or view. Sometimes we need to show others a new perspective to foster growth. Sometimes no effort is needed as your modeling of those three words show themselves in life. 

If you had a list of three words what would they be? Why would your gut spit those words out? What do they mean to you?

For her, it seems she is hyper-focused on her short term goals. These require commitment, consistency and prioritization daily. I do believe that is why her gut answered with these three words. However these words have depth. They go beyond her initial short term goals. Rather they are staples in her every day life. 

Sometimes she may get off track in life and need to refocus. Realign priorities. Recommit to something. Practice consistently doing what needs to be done to achieve a, b and c.

Life.

Words.

Actions.

In life she chooses words that have actions. She chooses actions that have meanings to her. She also take actions without hesitation. Sometimes she may stumble. Sometimes she may shine. Either way she is writing her story and living it each day. Some days you get an up front seat. Some days you don’t.

I am her. 

My action words for the purpose of this post are undoubtedly:

Commitment.

Consistency.

Prioritizing.

As I close out this post I can say each of these action words are helping me reach my next milestone. Where will your three words take you?